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Mark Manley
Mark Manley, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 402
Experience:  Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. Over 15 years exp. Married 30 years and happy.
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I have been at war with compulsions for most of my life, over

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I have been at war with compulsions for most of my life, over -eating, smoking, now drinking also, trading one or another over the years. I want to stop. I am getting very fat again and I am terrified that I will go back all the way up to 300 pounds again. I have been in psycho therapy, been on meds in the past, and now I have joined OA. I finally recognize that I have these compulsions. I am told that they most likely come from some childhood trauma and to be honest and examine where and why . I have. I have and come up with nothing. My childhood was wonderful. More than wonderful. There was no trauma , no drama, nothing. so now what ? I sincerely XXXXX XXXXX stop over eating, I have gone to such lengths to stop but here I am again, on the way up again. So, if there is no childhood trauma, then what ?

Now what ? What can I do to help myself ? Please, no superficial stuff.

I am 73 years old, have tried everything known to man I think, had a gastro by pass, 5 plastic surgery operations to remove excess skin, but then started to gain the weight back. I had an accident that put me in a wheel chair for over a year and that started the weight gain at that time. I have been unsuccessful at losing again, even though I say to myself every day that this is the day that I am going to reverse this gaining weight stuff. I am told that something is wrong with me emotionally that I am not aware of and that this triggers the over eating. I have gained back about half of what I lost after the gastro by pass surgery and I really am afraid for myself that I won't be able to stop this time either .
The trauma does not have to occur in childhood it can occur at any time in your life. Also it does not have to be a single event it can be cumulative. I have read some of your previous posts and see plenty of trauma in your life. That said, I have something else for you to consider. Perhaps you have suffered for years with sub clinical hormonal imbalance. Often this is not picked up on standard lab tests but causes health and emotional problems none the less.

Diagnosis and treatment by a holistic medical doctor who is familiar with bio-identical hormone replacement therapy and other natural interventions may be very helpful for you . A good starting place in this regard is

If you look in this direction you will have to be willing to go against the grain a bit.

Best of health and happiness to you.
Mark Manley
Mark Manley and other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 5 years ago.
I shall gibe that referral a look. My weight gaining actually began when I was only about 15 years old, long before any of the later crap. Even so, I myself don't feel that anything way out of the ordinary did happen to me even later - a poor marriage, there are millions of those, finding that my husband abused a child, again, there are zillions of those, losing a beloved lover, happens every day, being broke to the penny with an infant adopted from my own sister and rejected by my family, happens all the time to people, I had a job with my airline, I always had security and a place to live, food to eat and feed my children, a car, clothes, my mind and education - I call it being lucky in life - Yes , I was hurt and traumatized but so is everybody at some point, that is part of the human condition, still I have a total history of weight gain and loss, diets, and fasting, success and failure, but always, always, the 100 pound weight gains every so often, then the loss via starvation diets. I have never broken this cycle, not even having a gastro by pass.
Horrible things happen to others, the death or murder of a child, homelessness, grave illness, I have had none of these. I almost feel ashamed to complain about anything. Yet, here I am, desperate and again gaining weight. I am desperate to find what and how this is again happening and why I seem powerless to correct and reverse it. Thanks for being so kind to me. I do feel deserted and abandoned by many of those I have loved in my life.