Hello my name is ***** ***** you for bringing your concerns to Just Answer...with regards ***** ***** very' distressful and difficult situation..and I truly feel for you..
What this man is subjecting you to NOT ok!!and is definitely classified as sexual assault by way of his actions, threats and all in and through 'control'... and all against your will..This is a criminal offense hence,his wanting you to be quiet about it..
Under these very unpleasant and demeaning circumstances and from what you have described..what he is subjecting you to is of a highly traumatic nature..
Its very possible that your mind (to help protect you ) has blocked out or disassociated you from certain horrible episodes...
You may also be experiencing symptoms of ptsd which are often associated with abuse or sustained trauma in your life...
These symptoms may also include..ocd ( obsessive compulsive disorder)..intrusive thoughts, depression, much anxiety
, sleepless nights, panic
attacks, anger, rage, guilt, shame, relationship problems , fearfulness,sadness, distrust,..esteem issues..flashbacks,..and possibly more..
I have posted more information about this below for you..
The only way you will know for certain if you have dis-associated yourself from these horrible events will be via therapy and under the care of a supportive, caring, therapist trained in this field...and there my be 'flash backs' 'pieces of certain horrible some scenes..
First though, and in the light of this, I would truly be inclined to save yourself and move out of such a vulnerable and dangerous situation...This would be for your own safety...and overall mental and emotional wellbeing..
The longer you stay in it the worst your symptoms...Once away from the constant trauma that he is putting you through you would have time to consider if you will take nay further action against him, but! only if' you chose to....
I truly hope that this has proved helpful and given you further options in which to consider....Please, I pray that you do get out of there..and hopefully with the help of his wife..but, it may even be with the help of someone else..If you need any more help please don't hesitate to ask...Please know that I am here and that someone truly cares..
Karyn J (ProfClinicalDipCoBmin)