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Penny Rayas, MFT
Penny Rayas, MFT, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 395
Experience:  I have 20 years experience in the mental health field
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How can you help a family member that has some possible

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How can you help a family member that has some possible dementia or nerve problem that won't go to a doctor. My grandparents are having major problems. My grandmother sets home doesn't want to go anywhere and my grandfather has control of all the money while constantly feeding negativity with the economy and news 24x7. We think this is causing or caused my grand mother to go off her rocker but, how can we help? We can't go make either of them do anything and my grand father is so worried about money and blah blah. It is really worrying us something terrible and we want to help before something bad happens. Any ideas or options are Greatly appreciated!!! Thanks so much!

Hello there and thanks for asking JA. I wonder how old are your grandparents. Most older folks have medicare and can get medical if they can't afford the care. Maybe telling your grandfather that he worked hard and how others can help him also. There are social workers for the enderly and programs that can help. As for getting them to a psychologist if they are not open to that I think just taking them to their primary doctor's will help with getting diagnosed for dementia. Maybe getting them to participate in their church or other activity they enjoy can take their minds of the negative TV news. Can you tell me a bit about the dementia you see. I wonder if it is dementia or age related memory decline. Can you give me some symptoms? Stroke and diabetis can also cause mental decline.

Customer: replied 5 years ago.
My grandmother seems to be the possible dementia one. we've noticed that when she is nervous or upset she repeats questions and ask the same information over and over.she recently went with my mom and sister on a short getaway and on their way home she started taking about they had to get the mail picked up and on the mail truck totally confused. My grandfather goes around telling everyone she's crazy....getting either of them to go to a doctor or any other medical our related help is impossible with them. They refuse...

I am sorry about your grandparents. If things get worst your mother can become your grandmother's guardian. Your mom would have to call social services talk about your mom and ask for the steps to have your grandmother conserve. That really upsets family dynamics and your grandmother may become upset. It is a very difficult time. The best you can do is have someone that your grandmother looks up to like a priest or a sister or brother to talk to her about seeing her medical doctor. Your mother may have to put your grandmother to the hospital even if your grandmother does not want to. Maybe talking to her about things such as high blood pressure and heart disease can be the way to get her to see the doctor. When the elderly have dementia they don't realize they do because the mind fills out the blanks of time lost with possible events and that is why they become confused. Call the institute on aging or the center. I am sorry that there is not a better answer to this. You and your mother will have to be prepared for a fight with your grandmother. She can continue to refuse to go and you can call Adult Protective Services to see if there is help in your town.

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