Hi Janice, it's good to hear from you!
I am glad to hear that you were able to back off caring for your friends and have less stress in your life over the situation.
I think it is a great idea to have your husband admitted to the hospital when the insurance starts up again at the beginning of the year. It sounds like he needs a full evaluation to straighten out his medication and his physical condition. It would also give you a much needed break from caregiving.
Until then, you may want to work with his treatment team. Ask them about your access to your husband's medical records and if they are able to share information with you. I am not sure of the law in South Africa, but I would imagine it is the same or at least similar as it is here in the U.S. You can tell them anything about your husband and as long as your husband has signed a confidentiality release, they can share with you. As primary caregiver, you need to have this free and open communication with them so you can have the information you need.
The financial and medical issues are causing you a lot of stress. To help that stress, you need information about your husband's estate. As your husband is not able to handle these things himself, you may want to ask him if you can look into it. Then talk to the lawyer as your husband's representative. There is nothing wrong with doing that and it will relieve your stress some to know the status of the situation.
If you can, try to find someone who can help you care for your husband. He is putting demands on you physically and emotionally. Taking breaks is very important. Also, let him know you are coping the best you can and that if he needs more help, he can let you know without the guilt. You can do this in a kind yet firm way. Boundaries need set between you and your husband's situation so you don't feel constantly invaded upon. Lack of personal space and the caregiver's guilt you feel both can cause a lot of stress. It is a common situation among people who are caregivers. You may even want to consider time away if you can arrange it. You need a breather and a chance to enjoy yourself.
Here is a link to help you:
Let me know if you have more questions. I am glad to help.