If you feel like you are about to act on the suicidal thoughts, you must either 1) call 911, 2) go the nearest mental health crisis center (it's a good idea to call ahead & make sure they accept walk in patients), or 3) go the nearest ER. If you are not feeling safe to drive find alternate methods of transportation.
You can also call 1-800-suicide.
If you feel safe that you won't act on your suicidal thoughts, you should still see a live professional. If you can't find a good referral through friends, family, or your doctor, try using the internet or phone book. If you don't have insurance, most communities have a community mental health agency that can help patients.
Depression is best treated holistically. Medications can be helpful for some people. I also recommend 1) psychotherapy with a live therapist, and 2) learning some formal relaxation therapy.
I know you said you've tried therapy and medications, but I need to make sure you have had good trials. If you tell me more about your medication trials, I can give more specific feedback. Also, a minimum trial of psychotherapy is weekly for 6 months. Many people continue to benefit from even longer term therapy. If therapy doesn't feel like it's helping as you go through it, the solution is to tell your therapist about it. Either 1) you figure out some goals and the therapist can adjust style to help you accomplish them, or 2) you may realize the therapist isn't a good fit & he or she can help you find someone else.
The last 2 treatments I mentioned are proven by sophisticated studies using brain scans (CT, MRI, EEG, pet scans) to improve brain function.
Also, by formal relaxation therapy I mean yoga, meditation
, or similar methods. Having relaxing hobbies is also important, but not quite the same as formal relaxation therapy.
And remember you can't separate emotional health from physical health, so exercise & nutrition are vital.
There are also several self-help books you can read which can help including: 1) The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success by Deepak Chopra, 2) The Feeling Good Handbook by David D. Burns; 3) The Relaxation & Stress
Reduction Workbook (New Harbinger Self-Help Workbook) by XXXXX XXXXX, & 4) "The Depression Workbook: A Guide for Living with Depression and Manic Depression" by Mary Ellen Copeland and Matthew McKay.
I hope this helps. Let me know if you need more feedback. Good luck & take care.
Please let me know if you need more information. We can continue the dialog until you are satisfied. Once you are happy with the answers don't forget to hit the ACCEPT button & provide expert feedback. Also remember that this is not an official doctor patient relationship and not a substitute for a full live psychiatric evaluation. Thank you for using justanswers.com