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Mina, Clinical Psychologist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 188
Experience:  Working as a Highly Specialist Clinical Psychologist in NHS. Experience in both children and adults
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I am a 70 yr old woman who met a man on line who is 80. I

Resolved Question:

I am a 70 yr old woman who met a man on line who is 80. I did not know how old he was when we first started talking. H ehad put on his profile that he was 70. should I trust him?
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Mina replied 6 years ago.

I understand your dilemma and how this may make you feel rather insecure about him. Have you thought about confronting him with this?It is likely that he hided the truth from you as he may felt that 80 sounded too intimidating to a younger person and you may not have chosen to continue chatting to him if you knew the truth. At this point in his life, it is difficult to imagine him having another reason to hide the truth. What would you have to lose by him?You are both on low income as you say so what could you be endangering by continuing to chat to him?You may feel vulnerable because as you say you have fallen for him but do you think that he has ulterior motives by lying to you? You could try and tell him the truth, how your family found out as they were concerned and that although it makes no difference to you how old he is, however you do not appreciate lies.
I would suggest that you trusted your instinct and at the same time protect yourself if you feel that he may be untrustworthy. This misinformation he gave you is not necessarily a sign of dishonesty or a deceitful character but as you would need to do with everyone new you met, you would need to "try" the relationship first, as trust is gained.

I hope it all works out for you

All the best

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