Seeking expert counseling is a sign of strength. A personal relationship with a caring professional is proven clinically effective.
Dear Mrs. Barnes,
I am so sorry for your difficult situation. In some ways your son seems like a very noble idealist who champions the underdog. and stands up for what is right. His idealism is in contrast with a world, which in many ways, does not care, and does not appreciate well-meaning intervention, seeing it as vigilantism.
He needs to learn not to start any battles that he cannot win, and find other ways of of dealing with perceived injustices. I'm sure that some of his depression comes from his realisation that life isn't always fair, and that sometimes justice is a rare commodity.
He sounds like a son to be very proud of, but he has to learn the limits of his personal space and the value of the personal space of others.
I urge you to find a very caring and intelligent counsellor or child psychologist who can help him readjust his thinking (cognitive behavioural therapy - CBT).
Since he is so intelligent, he can be helped through exposure to books that will help guide his thinking (bibliotherapy). I have several recommendations for you. These are available at Amazon UK and other booksellers, are not expensive, and you can have them within days.
- Sometimes I Get Angry (A Read-Together Book for Parents and Children) by Jane Werner *****, ***** Switzer and J. Cotter Hirschberg
- The Explosive Child: A New Approach for Understanding and Parenting Easily Frustrated, Chronically Inflexible Children by Ross W. Greene
- Angry Children, Worried Parents: Seven Steps to Help Families Manage Anger (Seven Steps Family Guides) by Sam Goldstein, Robert B. Brooks and Sharon Weiss
- Lonely, Sad, and Angry: A Parent's Guide to Depression in Children by Barbara D Ingersoll
- Strong-Willed Child or Dreamer? by Dana Spears
Your son will grow out of this. He needs a little bit of guidance but he sounds very exceptional and wonderful, and in many ways the world needs more children like him, as long as he can learn to control his emotional reaction.
I wish you great success in raising this exceptional child.
Elliott Sewell, LPCC, NCC