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TherapistMarryAnn, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5822
Experience:  Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.
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Kate, I think the problem I am having the most with is the

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I think the problem I am having the most with is the way she allowed me to upset. She did explain to me that she was late because of her electronic scheduler and that if she spent more time with me, the next person would be waiting and that would only leave her 15 minutes for lunch as it was. At the time, I couldn`t have cared less about any of those problems she had. I know, I`m not being very understanding.
But the fact remains that she knows me well enough to know that I would probably allow this incident and our ending to spoil my entire weekend and that I would be really struggling. At least I think she knows this as we`ve spoken about it before.
I do remember her telling me once that it is not good that I allow how our session goes to dictate how the rest of my week goes. Do you agree with this statement. Maybe I place far too much onus of responsibility on her to make me happy. I am just not sure about this.
I do like her and I believe she is helping me so I don`t think a getting a new therapist is the right thing for me to do. She has proven to be quite empathetic in the past. So I do think she cares but was preoccupied. That doesn`t mean I don`t feel pretty hurt by her actions.
I wish I knew how to meet some of my own needs. I usually just isolate myself or become destructive but only toward myself. I don`t know how to help myself. I certainly don`t want her to hold all the power of how I feel 24 hours a day, seven days a week. But that seems to be how it is right now. I obviously am a failure at self-help.
I feel so sad about the entire situation and I already have so much other stuff to be sad about that I don`t need anything extra.
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  TherapistMarryAnn replied 6 years ago.

It may be that she understands you would be hurt but there was not much she could do about it. Or she did have a choice but at the time was insensitive. But you have a choice about this. And this may be a good time to look at your options. Do you want to have someone else have control over how you feel, or do you want to work on learning how to deal with your own feelings? This may be a good time to start working towards helping yourself.

There are many ways to work on this problem. The best place to start is your self esteem, as I mentioned. It is up to you, though. You are the only one that can work through this and decide what to do.


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