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Penny Rayas, MFT
Penny Rayas, MFT, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 395
Experience:  I have 20 years experience in the mental health field
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Why would a mother ever sexually abuse her son? Why doesnt

Customer Question

Why would a mother ever sexually abuse her young son? Why doesnt law enforment or Child services seem to be working seriously on this case to protect the child? My husband is in the military and doesnt have alot of money, what can we do to protect this child and keep him out of the situation with his mother?
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Penny Rayas, MFT replied 6 years ago.

I am sorry about your experiences with CPS. I am sorry that they do not take this seriously. Keep making reports. It is also important to get therapy services for the child. Most pedophiles were abused as a child. Pedophiles are not able to think right and control their impulses. Most people do not realize that pedophiles are often close to the child such as parents and grandparents. Can you tell me a bit more about what happened and how old is the child? Did the child told you that this happened and the authorities do not believe her?

Customer: replied 6 years ago.
The child is 7 and male. He told his father and myself what had happened after we noticed that he would become etremly nervous and shake whenever it was bath time, time to change into jammies or intoclothes for the day or when using the toilet if anyonw ouwld be around he would get nervous and shake and look very fearful. We finally asked him what was bothering him. he cried, said nothing, we explained to him that if something is bothering him he needed to tell us. He said he is just sad and nervous, we asked why, no answer from the child, his dad then told him that if ANYONE is saying or doing ANYTHING to make him feel sad or nervous that he (the child) needed to tell a grown up. He then stated that his mother touches his privates. after asking the when, where, how, and why we found out that she tells him she is "just checking him", apparently for bruising and such, that she tells him not to tell anyone but if anyone asks tell them im just checking you, the child cries while she does this and she tells him to shut up and that its nothing to cry about. he also (using a hand to "be" a penis showed us HOW she touches bc he wasnt able to describe to touch, he is only 7) CPS isnt doing anything bc mom admits to touching says shes checking him, and the child has "confirmed" that since he isnt telling them HOW she touches,its very upsetting. Yes mother of the child has said that she was sexually abused as a child. PLEASE HELP
Expert:  Penny Rayas, MFT replied 6 years ago.
Hello there, Please a have therapist see the child. In play therapy this will come up. When a therapist finds out about it from the child she will also report the abuse. You can teach the child to say no to the mother and practice saying no with him. IS the woman violent? Maybe you can have a conversation with the mom about what her son told you that he feels uncomfortable. I still think a theapist is your best treatment option. Maybe you husband can talk to her, a lawyer. The army has resources.