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psychlady, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 6893
Experience:  Psychotherapist specializing in the treatment of a variety of mental health issues.
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My 4yo son at some point accessed my Netflix and watched an

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My 4yo son at some point accessed my Netflix and watched an adult sex scene (at least that is what we have theorized through our questioning). During the past few months he has been playing a game with his younger sister and cousins he is calling "the sitting game". We have addressed him in every way possible within our own parenting arsenal to correct the problem, even threat of spanking for playing the game. Nothing we have done has stopped him from initiating the game. Our main concerns are was this really the result of seeing a sex act or should we be concerned someone is showing him this game? What is the most appropriate way to deal with eliminating the problem? Should we worry about this developing into more deviant sexual behavior as he gets older?

He seems to be reproducing behavior that he at least saw on video. If he relates a more serious reasons then act on that then. Right now he may have caught a seen and he is reproducing this. You do have to have strong boundaries in dealing with early sexual issues. A child this age knows that something feels good and doesn't have the judgment to know that it is not appropriate. This may even be a natural response to this situation. You can punish him not physically but you have to realize that his sexual knowledge and consequences is limited. You have to with that consequence continue to verbalize that what he is doing is inappropriate and brother/sister does not like his behavior when he is inappropriate. This is going to take time. He may transition to masturbating which is very normal. This is not a sign of perverted practices or later sexual behavior. He is simply reproducing what feels good

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Customer: replied 6 years ago.
Do you feel seeking counseling would be appropriate or is this something that can be handled internally? My fear is as he starts school and interacts with other children, he may inappropriatey interact with a non family member which could cause the situation to be more volatile then dealing with family. I also wanted to know other signs to look for if there is sexual abuse involved. The game he plays seems to be isolated to removal of clothing and straddling eachother. To my knowledge there has been no other acts or penetration.
Finding treatment on a brief basis could be helpful. Someone trained in play therapy could help you a lot. I think you are thinking very responsibly and it would be a idea before school. Signs of sexual abuse do include inappropriate play but children also can be shy and withdrawn and fearful of others. Explore this in a therapeutic setting.
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