Mental Health

Have Mental Health Questions? Ask a Psychiatrist Online

Ask an Expert,
Get an Answer ASAP!

Mental Health

I'm still having some problems with my mom, but thought I'd

Customer Question
get your advice on something...
I'm still having some problems with my mom, but thought I'd get your advice on something. Do you have time to chat?
Submitted: 6 years ago.Category: Mental Health
Show More
Show Less
Ask Your Own Mental Health Question
Answered in 9 minutes by:
7/1/2011
Mental Health Professional: TherapistMarryAnn, Therapist replied 6 years ago
TherapistMarryAnn
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5,899
Experience: Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.
Verified
Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, L :

Good to hear from you again. Sure, go ahead

Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, L :

It seems that you might be offlline, so let me know when you are available again.

TherapistMarryAnn
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5,899
Experience: Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.
Verified
TherapistMarryAnn and 87 other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you
Ask your own question now
Customer reply replied 6 years ago
I'm available now- sorry about that. Can you let me know when you're available?
Mental Health Professional: TherapistMarryAnn, Therapist replied 6 years ago

I'm here. Go ahead and give me an idea of what is going on.

Kate

Ask Your Own Mental Health Question
Customer reply replied 6 years ago
It's trying to charge me again when I try to chat with you!! :( Help?
Mental Health Professional: TherapistMarryAnn, Therapist replied 6 years ago

I'm not sure why it's doing that. You can either ignore it or contact the moderators and they can help you.

You might also want to try responding to this thread. If you try to start another question through chat, it may think you are asking another question and therefore try to charge you.

Kate

Ask Your Own Mental Health Question
Customer reply replied 6 years ago
Oh, okay- That's weird, sorry for all the back and forth. Do you remember what we talked about before?

Well, my mom had planned to come out here to see us- we haven't seen her in 2 years or talked to her much because she's been ignoring us. Then she cancelled the trip. Then she re-instated the trip, but this time wants to bring the boyfriend she left my dad for. We tried to politely ask her not to bring him, but she was insisting. Also, she booked a hotel about 10 blocks from my dad's house, so I think she's trying to play some kind of game. Now she's cancelled again. She's really being insensitive to her kids. I can show you the letters if it would help. Should I just write her off? I suggested therapy like you recommended but she just ignored me.
Mental Health Professional: TherapistMarryAnn, Therapist replied 6 years ago

Yes, I do remember your situation. And thanks for requesting to talk with me again. I am glad to be able to help.

It certainly sounds like your mother has some issues going on.

If she ignored the suggestion of therapy, then she may either be scared to go with you, or she does not want to. But any attempt to try to work on the relationship should be met with some interest by her. If she ignores you, that is not a good sign about how she feels.

Your mother needs to visit without her boyfriend at this point. It should be obvious to her that you and your family are not ready to meet with her boyfriend or accept her life choices right now. Your family needs her attention and those damaged relationships need to be repaired before other people, like a boyfriend, are brought in. If your mother tries to bring in a boyfriend at this point, it is only going to cause more friction and more heartache.

And the fact that she is trying to do this right nearby your father is not good, either. Stirring up trouble and trying to hurt your father is not going to help things. It leaves you and your family to take sides, and that is not in her favor, either.

If she was willing to work with you on these problems it might be a good idea to try to stay in contact with her. But if you feel she is only doing these things for her own advantage, then it may be a good idea to back off for a while and give her space. If she contacts you, let her know that you are busy and cannot deal with the situation for now. Then leave it at that. This gives you time to step out of the situation and get a break to think things through. But it also leaves a door open in case you think it all through and change your mind about trying again with your mom.

Let me know what you think,

Kate

Ask Your Own Mental Health Question
Customer reply replied 6 years ago
That's exactly what she's doing- trying to work things to her own advantage, as usual. I don't believe she'll ever change, and that is very sad. She seems to think she's in the right, but I won't let her bully me. She's a very sad, unhappy person.
Mental Health Professional: TherapistMarryAnn, Therapist replied 6 years ago

It sounds like she might be trying to work this to her advantage.

If you feel she would not change, then you certainly can cut all ties to her. Just be sure to be good to yourself afterward. Allow yourself time to mourn not so much the relationship you had with her, but what should have been. Everyone deserves loving and kind parents who want the best for them and care enough to be there. When you don't get that in your life, there is a sense of disappointment and sadness. It is a loss. So don't forget to allow yourself those feelings if you choose to end your relationship with your mother.

Kate

Ask Your Own Mental Health Question
Ask TherapistMarryAnn Your Own Question
TherapistMarryAnn
TherapistMarryAnn
TherapistMarryAnn, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5,899
5,899 Satisfied Customers
Experience: Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.

TherapistMarryAnn is online now

A new question is answered every 9 seconds

How JustAnswer works:

  • Ask an ExpertExperts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional AnswerVia email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site. Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction GuaranteeRate the answer you receive.

JustAnswer in the News:

Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... Justanswer.com.
JustAnswer.com...has seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like justanswer.com/legal
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.

What Customers are Saying:

I can go as far as to say it could have resulted in saving my sons life and our entire family now knows what bipolar is and how to assist and understand my most wonderful son, brother and friend to all who loves him dearly. Thank you very much

Corrie MollPretoria, South Africa

I thank-you so much! It really helped to have this information and confirmation. We will watch her carefully and get her in for the examination and US right away if things do not improve. God bless you as well!

ClaudiaAlbuquerque, NM

Outstanding response time less than 6 minutes. Answered the question professionally and with a great deal of compassion.

KevinBeaverton, OR

Suggested diagnosis was what I hoped and will take this info to my doctor's appointment next week.
I feel better already! Thank you.

ElanorTracy, CA

Thank you to the Physician who answered my question today. The answer was far more informative than what I got from the Physicians I saw in person for my problem.

JulieLockesburg, AR

You have been more help than you know. I seriously don't know what my sisters situation would be today if you had not gone above and beyond just answering my questions.

John and StefanieTucson, AZ

I have been dealing with an extremely serious health crisis for over three years, and one your physicians asked me more questions, gave me more answers and encouragement than a dozen different doctors who have been treating me!!

Janet VPhoenix, AZ

< Previous | Next >

Meet the Experts:

Dr. Keane

Dr. Keane

Therapist

1,379 satisfied customers

Clinical Psychology PhD, Licensed Professional Counselor with experience in marriage/family, teens and child psychology.

TherapistMarryAnn

TherapistMarryAnn

Therapist

5,899 satisfied customers

Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.

Dr. Olsen

Dr. Olsen

Psychologist

2,336 satisfied customers

PsyD Psychologist

Norman M.

Norman M.

Principal psychotherapist in private practice. Newspaper contributor, over 2000 satisfied clients on JA

2,246 satisfied customers

ADHP(NC), DEHP(NC), ECP, UKCP Registered.

Dr. Michael

Dr. Michael

Psychologist

2,177 satisfied customers

Licensed Ph.D. Clinical Health Psychology with 30 years of experience in private practive and as a clinical psychology university professor.

Steven Olsen

Steven Olsen

Therapist

1,728 satisfied customers

More than twenty years of expertise in counseling, psychological diagnosis and education

Anna

Anna

Mental Health Professional

1,656 satisfied customers

Licensed Clinical Social Worker with 29 years in addictions and mental health.

< Previous | Next >

Related Mental Health Questions
I'm depressed just finished my divorce yesterday feel so sad
Hello, I'm depressed just finished my divorce yesterday feel so sad how to get over it faster no energy my eyes tell on me. My X is who wanted it he has abusive and acts like the victim and blames me … read more
Linda D.
Linda D.
Master\u0027s Degree
795 satisfied customers
I currently have Stage 4 cancer that metastasized to my
I currently have Stage 4 cancer that metastasized to my chest wall. I also completely broke my ankle two months ago. I am home, cannot drive and live with a husband who is basically gone most of the t… read more
Linda D.
Linda D.
Master\u0027s Degree
795 satisfied customers
The other day I think I had the most fun of my life singing
Hey! The other day I think I had the most fun of my life singing I front of the school and I never wanted the day to end. But now a couple days later I remember how much fun I had but when I think of … read more
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
Counselor
Master\u0027s Degree
171 satisfied customers
Im struggling alot about handling. Strws. Sad and i dont
Ever since i was little i always struggled with waking up sad and then bursting into tears for no reason… read more
Linda D.
Linda D.
Master\u0027s Degree
795 satisfied customers
I feel this feeling of guilt and sadness and I'm not sure
I feel this feeling of guilt and sadness and I'm not sure why Would you happen to have an explanation for that … read more
LeahMSWuofm
LeahMSWuofm
Clinical Social Worker
Master\u0027s Degree
772 satisfied customers
I need advice on my relationship and my happiness. I'm
I need advice on my relationship and my happiness. I'm dealing with a lot of stress and depression… read more
LeahMSWuofm
LeahMSWuofm
Clinical Social Worker
Master\u0027s Degree
772 satisfied customers
I feel sad so much I need help dealing with how I feel
I feel sad so much I need help dealing with how I feel because it's affecting with my relationship with my boyfriend and my happiness in general… read more
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
Counselor
Master\u0027s Degree
171 satisfied customers
Second opinion] OKMH98-130 I've been very sad and in a bad
second opinion] OKMH98-130 I've been very sad and in a bad state of mind ever since my mother figure passed away last year. I suffer from insomnia ever since. Loss of interest in daily activities. I p… read more
Juliet Cooper
Juliet Cooper
Doctorate of Psychology
29 satisfied customers
OKMH98-130 I've been very sad and in a bad state of mind
OKMH98-130 I've been very sad and in a bad state of mind ever since my mother figure passed away last year. I suffer from insomnia ever since. I've been sad often. I noticed my mood is better when I'm… read more
Linda D.
Linda D.
Master\u0027s Degree
795 satisfied customers
I have this weird feeling that comes and goes ,, i used to
i have this weird feeling that comes and goes ,, i used to have anxiety and used Lexotan 3mg for about 3 years ,, i have stopped using it for like 6 to 7 months i felt fine , now im coping/struggling … read more
Dr. Kaushik
Dr. Kaushik
PSYCHIATRIST ( MD Psychiatry)
Doctoral Degree
204 satisfied customers
I am 54 and sad and lonely, just like the lady I am reading
I am 54 and sad and lonely, just like the lady I am reading about right now. … read more
Linda D.
Linda D.
Master\u0027s Degree
795 satisfied customers
I am so sad and exhausted. My baby brother dies April 2015,
I am so sad and exhausted. My baby brother dies April 2015, 18 months later i list my Mom. I had been her caterer … read more
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
JohnMichaels,MS,LPC
Counselor
Master\u0027s Degree
171 satisfied customers
For the past three years, I felt sad, I thought it was just
For the past three years, I felt sad, I thought it was just temporary, but I feel like I get worse at every waking moment, there shouldn't be a valid reason for me to feel this way, but just last year… read more
Dr. Kaushik
Dr. Kaushik
PSYCHIATRIST ( MD Psychiatry)
Doctoral Degree
204 satisfied customers
Am very heart broken and sad while writing this, my 5 year
Hi Am very heart broken and sad while writing this, my 5 year old has treble in school, she had treble once we were in Iraq last year when she doesn't like a class member or a teacher she won't perfor… read more
Dr. Kaushik
Dr. Kaushik
PSYCHIATRIST ( MD Psychiatry)
Doctoral Degree
204 satisfied customers
Im feeling very sad and isolated ... yes... Im on brintillex
yes... Im on brintillex 30 mg and amytryptallin at night to sleep … read more
Linda D.
Linda D.
Master\u0027s Degree
795 satisfied customers
My daughter is 32yrs old and for the last week has been sad,
My daughter is 32yrs old and for the last week has been sad, depressed emotional, and very tired. She has had some weight gain. He current mood has affected her at work and at home we try to talk to h… read more
TherapistMarryAnn
TherapistMarryAnn
Therapist
5,899 satisfied customers
I'm always sad! Yes I've lost very important family members
I'm always sad! Yes I've lost very important family members and a relationship with my daughter's father ended in 2008. Though the relationship ended so long ago deep inside I have a lot of feelings f… read more
LeahMSWuofm
LeahMSWuofm
Clinical Social Worker
Master\u0027s Degree
772 satisfied customers
I feel no emotions but anger and apathy. I don't get sad,
I feel no emotions but anger and apathy. I don't get sad, happy, excited, or scared. I have no emotional connection to anyone or anything but my daughter. And before I had her I didn't feel love for a… read more
Therapist Leslie
Therapist Leslie
Masters, Professional Psychology
5 satisfied customers
Disclaimer: Information in questions, answers, and other posts on this site ("Posts") comes from individual users, not JustAnswer; JustAnswer is not responsible for Posts. Posts are for general information, are not intended to substitute for informed professional advice (medical, legal, veterinary, financial, etc.), or to establish a professional-client relationship. The site and services are provided "as is" with no warranty or representations by JustAnswer regarding the qualifications of Experts. To see what credentials have been verified by a third-party service, please click on the "Verified" symbol in some Experts' profiles. JustAnswer is not intended or designed for EMERGENCY questions which should be directed immediately by telephone or in-person to qualified professionals.

Disclaimer: Information in questions, answers, and other posts on this site ("Posts") comes from individual users, not JustAnswer; JustAnswer is not responsible for Posts. Posts are for general information, are not intended to substitute for informed professional advice (medical, legal, veterinary, financial, etc.), or to establish a professional-client relationship. The site and services are provided "as is" with no warranty or representations by JustAnswer regarding the qualifications of Experts. To see what credentials have been verified by a third-party service, please click on the "Verified" symbol in some Experts' profiles. JustAnswer is not intended or designed for EMERGENCY questions which should be directed immediately by telephone or in-person to qualified professionals.

Show MoreShow Less

Ask Your Question

x