I cant afford to pay to see a head doctor but i know i need…

Thank you for trusting JustAnswer with your important question.
It can seem embarrassing to ask for help, but it rarely is as scary or as dangerous as we fear. You can look at your employee handbook (if you were given on) and it might list your benefits. You can also ask HR if your company has an EAP. An EAP is an "employee assistance program" that usually offers free counseling services. Many people use EAP visits to talk about stress, marriage issues, job stress, and other topics that have nothing to do with a mental illness. Your HR and your company are not told what you talk about in session. Many times they aren't even told what specific employees used the service or how many sessions they attended because they pay a flat rate for the benefit. EAP counseling usually lasts 3-6 free visits, but some programs cover 10-12. The benefit is free, has no copayment, and does not require that a counselor give you a mental illness diagnosis.
If you have health insurance for medical issues, you probably got an insurance card. You can call member services and ask if you have mental health benefits. Your employer and HR are not told what benefits you seek under your health plan. Health plans usually cover counseling for a similar copayment to what you pay medical doctors for their visits. Many people I see come through an EAP and then switch to their regular insurance benefits if they need additional sessions.
If you do not have insurance, or you find out it does not cover any mental health services, you might qualify for free or low cost counseling services in your area depending on your income. You can find these services by calling 211 from a landline phone. If you only have a cell phone, visit Texas211.org.
But your life and wellbeing are important. Get help. There's no need to suffer when there is help out there. Don't let your fear and depression keep you trapped.
Sincerely,
Selah