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Answered in 16 minutes by:
6/16/2011
Dr. Mark, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5,335
Experience: Dr. Mark is a PhD in psychology in private practice
VerifiedHi! I believe I can be of help with this issue.
First, let me say that it is very beautiful that you are trying to help this young lady. I can imagine how overwhelming and frustrating this situation must be for her. It is clear that she is feeling still very trapped inside from this relationship. So it's wonderful that she has a resource like you.
So, let me address my answer directly to her and perhaps you can print it out and read it together and discuss it. Okay? Here goes:
I want you to focus on this aspect only: getting yourself free INSIDE, emotionally, spiritually and in your thoughts from that relationship. There are two ways to do this. One way is in psychotherapy. The other is by reading some of the really good books that are out there for people recovering from being with a narcissistic person who has dominated their lives. People just like you.
I am going to recommend 3 wonderful books that you need to read. They are all readily available:
Freeing Yourself from the Narcissist in Your Life by ***** *****ez-Lewi.
The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists by Eleanor Payson.
Disarming the Narcissist by Wendy Behary.
Each one of these books comes from a different perspective and so offers you different insights. You've already left this narcissistic person. So it is insight that will help you at this time. Because what is left is not the effect of the sociopathic part of his personality, but the narcissistic part that gobbled up your inner self into his own.
Start with these books. And take your time. But you might find that you need to work on regaining your sense of self with a professional. Then I would like you to go to a site that I like for finding a therapist in Australia:
http://www.goodtherapy.com.au/find_a_therapist.php
I like it because you can enter lots of different information. And the results give you a photo of the therapist and detailed information. This can help you when you begin to interview someone to see if he or she has experience dealing with someone who has lived with a narcissist.
So please don't give up hope and keep working at this!
Okay, I'm back. Again, it is wonderful you are helping. I wish you the very best.
Please remember to click the green accept button. Feel free to continue the discussion; my goal is to get you the best answers possible. Bonuses are always appreciated! If I can be of further help with any issue, just put "for Dr. Mark" in the front of your new question, and I'll be the one to answer it. All the best, ***** *****
Dr. Mark, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5,335
Experience: Dr. Mark is a PhD in psychology in private practice
VerifiedDr. Mark and 87 other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you
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