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Arundhati, Counselor & Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 259
Experience:  Licensed psychotherapist, Published Wellness Author
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What is the difference between being a "Scorekeeper" and

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What is the difference between being a "Scorekeeper" and being someone who is just being cautious that they are getting the reciprocity found in a healthy relationship?

From what you describe it sounds like your needs are not really reciprocated and met in the relationship. This is not scorekeeping. When you genuinely feel that over a period your needs have not been met (emotional, physical, psychological) then there is certainly a problem in the relationship.

The reason for such a pattern/dynamic developing in your relationship would be many. For example, it could be a communication issue, a difference in personality issue, a falling apart due to some underlying problems etc. What might be most helpful in effectively addressing this issue is couple's counseling. You can check out the couple's counselors available in your area through this directory.

I hope this was helpful.

Please do let me know if you have additional questions/thoughts/clarifications.

Kind regards,

Arundhati and other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you