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Kristin, Mental Health Professional
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 454
Experience:  Licensed Mental Health Counselor. 11+ years specialist in mental health. Expertise and insight!
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After being seperated from my husband for over a year we are

Resolved Question:

After being seperated from my husband for over a year we are trying to reconsile. He had gone to jail for a dui and I found out then he was also using drugs. We seperated. Now we're trying to work our marrage out, my family is upset with me. Even though I let them know he's changed...what do I say to them so they understand?
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Kristin replied 6 years ago.

Hello and thank you for your question.

Do you two have kids together that you are still raising? Also, has your husband undergone counseling or rehab for his drug use and drinking problem?

Customer: replied 6 years ago.
he has gone through rehab, we have no children
Expert:  Kristin replied 6 years ago.

okay, so I would tell your family that he is very regretful of his actions and admits freely that he does have a substance problem (i'm assuming these things are true). Also let them know that you can understand their concerns and that you are also being cautious.

That your husband has gone through rehab and is continuing counseling or treatment etc. for the long-term. (IF he isn't doing this, then he really needs to be doing this).

That you are taking things slowly and not jumping right back in, but seeing how the treatment goes and that if he continues to abuse drugs, etc. you will take the appropriate action at that point. You can email this to them or talk in person, whichever you feel they could hear you the best. Ultimately, it is your choice to stay with him or not, and they can be concerned, of course as well. Let them know you understand their concerns and in fact share them as well, and will take things slowly and cautiously. That is really all you can say to them.

Also, you may want to look into some counseling for yourself or joining a support group for spouses of substance abusers, such as Al-Anon where you will get lots of support and resources for you as well. Best wishes. Please click ACCEPT button so I'm credited for my help today. Feel free to respond here to me, even after click accept. thank you.

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