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psychlady, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 6893
Experience:  Psychotherapist specializing in the treatment of a variety of mental health issues.
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i was going with my girlfriend about 8 months, she is a widow

Customer Question

i was going with my girlfriend about 8 months, she is a widow of 2 years, her husband was bedridden for 10, then his uncle was sick , she cared for him 5 years, we both have common intress and things we like to do, everything was fine untill, a soppose male friend of hers got sick and i found out she was his power of attoney, he had a stroke and she spent the whole day ate the hospital, when he was growing up in the town next to me, he was a womanizer, using woman , when my girl friend was with her 1st husband, she work at his resterant, any time she needed to talk to it was him, now 20 years later, now when i had myshoulder operated on, she did not want to go, she started to avoid me , not calling as much, our texing stopped and no interminsey, when we were to go out this week , she said couldn,t go monday or tuesday, i said ok, i stopped over to use her computor, he is there, i said i go to library, it did not seem to bother her, she tex me, could not understand why i was mad, when we went on vacation to maine , he texed her on a sunday, i told her him or me , she said i can,t turn him away, i broke up with he , in my eyes she has been lieing to me all the time
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  psychlady replied 6 years ago.
If they are friends, then decide if it is worth losing her over having a male friend. This issue can be resolved if both of you are willing to compromise. If you feel that they are more than friends then that is another issue. This needs to be explored with your girlfriend to see if they are a couple. If male friends are uncomfortable for you then you have to decide how important that is. You can't be together and differ on this issue unless you come to a decision. I don't know why she ignored your illness. That probably was hurtful. Ask her why she did that and tell her how it made you feel. sometimes people feel unimportant in that situation. Discuss this openly.
Customer: replied 6 years ago.
this person was involved in the breakup of other relationships, and his wife finialy got fed up and divoroused him, what type of answer was that you gave?
Expert:  psychlady replied 6 years ago.
If he is that type of person, I understand your concern. I wouldn't put up with this either but everyone has their standards. Tell you girlfriend you are uncomfortable with the kind of person that he is and his history and you prefer that she find other friends. You have that right. State this clearly and find a compromise