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Carol Kryder LMFT
Carol Kryder LMFT, Mental Health Professional
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 808
Experience:  APA Board Certified, Diplomate,Substance Abuse Professional, 20 years family therapy experience
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How do I know if my granddaughter is being molested? The

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How do I know if my granddaughter is being molested? The other day my grandchildren (2) 1 boy (5yrs) and a girl (3yrs) were watching TV and I left momentarily, when I was coming back to the room I overheard my grandson asking my grandaughter if she wanted to play to touch her bom-bom (I don't know from where he got that word). She said yes and I entered the room and asked them what kind of game was that. Both look at me scary and my grandson said, no nothing. I told them that I did not want to know that they were playing to touch their parts. I have more to ask... When I asked my daughter if she knew about these games, she told me that she has talked with the kids and they are not too much incline to follow what mom says; father does not support mom in admonishing or trying to stop behavior. My daughter asked the girl if daddy was touching her one day and she answered everyday. My daughter does not want to get obssesive with this, but I insist that the girl needs to be seeing by a doctor which will talk to her; or she is too little and is the age, is this normal? Not for me, I was raised in a hispanic family and the touching was prohibited, and any related game.
Carol Kryder LMFT :

Hello and Welcome to JustAnswer. Your question is not closed until you are satisfied. I am happy to assist you with your question.

Carol Kryder LMFT :

Your granddaughter is not too little to be evaluated by a child specialist. It doesn't need to be a doctor. A therapist can ask her appropriate questions, and determine if she needs to be seen by a doctor. I don't think your concerns are unreasonable. Your grandson needs to be evaluated also, since he was the one who initiated the touching. It is very important that your daughter explain to them that no one touches their privates unless they are being helped if they are hurt, or a doctor needs to touch them, etc. They are not to touch other people's privates, also.

Carol Kryder LMFT :

Bot***** *****ne: Both of them need to be evaluated by a child specialist to see if further examination is necessary or if authorities should be notified.

Carol Kryder LMFT :

Let me know if you have further questions.


Yes, I need your opinion regarding the father of the children (my daughter's husband), why he does not backup mother in telling the kids what not to play? Do you think that the father is in favor of those games? He does not talk too much and I have to ask him questions to establish a conversation. I always thought that a father would be incline to be the best friend of his son, but he prefers to be with the girl; and I feel sorry with the boy who in turn I can see he feels rejected by his father. Can you refer me to a therapist in St Petersburg, FL?

Sorry, I am not familiar with therapists in St. Petersburg, but you can check with your insurance company or ask the kids' pediatrician if they have a recommendation.

I agree it is strange that the father does not back up mother and prefers the girl's company to the boy. All the more reason for the children to be evaluated.

Good luck to you.
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