How JustAnswer Works:
  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site. Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.
Ask Elliott, LPCC, NCC Your Own Question
Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 7664
Experience:  35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
Type Your Mental Health Question Here...
Elliott, LPCC, NCC is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

I'm considering leaving my husband. I'm suffering a lot of

This answer was rated:

I'm considering leaving my husband. I'm suffering a lot of self-doubt about this. I start to question if I really am in an emotionally abusive relationship. We tried couples therapy years ago - but things have gone back to their old ways. Should I try therapy again with him or alone? There is a part of me that doesn't even want to try anymore - is this normal? Is there any information online about emotional abuse? I feel so stuck and unhappy.
Seeking expert counseling is a sign of strength. A personal relationship with a caring professional is proven clinically effective.

Dear friend,

You have been trying to get relief from the negative aspects of this relationship for quite some time (7 years plus!) and things have gotten to the point that you are close to giving up.

You might try therapy with him again, if he is willing. You could tell him that you cannot endure the emotional battering any longer and let him know that this is a last-ditch effort. This way, you will have a clear conscience that you did your best. It might even work, but considering the fact that this behavior has been ingrained into your family system, it will be hard to break.

If you cannot get him to try to change, then you might need a counselor for personal support, and a divorce attorney to discuss your legal options with.

For some useful informaton about the nature of emotional abuse, try this website, which contains much useful information that will help you decide what is going on.

I am sure that you avoid pushing his button, as best you can.

Life should bring a measure of joy and a relationship should bring support, comfort, and tenderness - not fear or distress. Something has to change. It it can't be one thing, then it will have to be the other. If you have to make a break, it will eventually level out.

I wish you strength and courage to begin the new year with a firm plan of action. I wish you a wonderful year ahead, filled wih a great new possibilities .

Blessings to you,

Elliott Sewell,LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC and other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you