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Ask TherapistMarryAnn Your Own Question
TherapistMarryAnn, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5809
Experience:  Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.
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24 years ago I had a one nite stand with my stepbrother.

Resolved Question:

24 years ago I had a one nite stand with my stepbrother. then i got pergant i alway believed it to be my husbands but just in the last year my stepfamily started to ask if it is my stepbrothers the time line does not work for it not to be my husbands. but i cant get the what ifs out of my head please help me
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  TherapistMarryAnn replied 6 years ago.
Kate McCoy :

Hi, I'd like to chat with you about your problem if you are available.

Customer: replied 6 years ago.
you wanted to chat
Expert:  TherapistMarryAnn replied 6 years ago.

From what you said, it sounds like you might be very concerned about who is the father of your child. I am assuming that your stepfamily either has suspicions that the child is your stepbrother's or someone has told them what occurred between you and your stepbrother. You did not mention whether or not your husband is aware of the situation which may also affect how you are feeling about it.

The main issue here seems to be your peace of mind about who is the father of your child. You said the timing of the child points to your husband being the father, but the suspicion of your family is creating doubts for you.

Have you thought of obtaining a DNA test? That may alleviate your concerns and allow you to address the issue and settle any remaining doubts. You could speak with your doctor for the best way to go about getting the test done. I believe the test is also available on line, but I am unsure of the accuracy. might be a good place to search and get feedback about the tests. I am sure your doctor could also let you know if the tests are accurate.

Once you get an answer to your dilemma it may help you resolve the issue and have peace of mind.

My best to you,


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Customer: replied 6 years ago.
my husband knows all about it. i thought of a dna test but i dont want to tell the child
Expert:  TherapistMarryAnn replied 6 years ago.

That is a difficult situation. Picking between your child being aware of the situation and your peace of mind.

You may benefit from sitting down with your husband and talking out your options. Balancing the pros and cons of the situation for not only you but your child is important. If you decide to pursue the DNA anyway, family counseling would be an enormous help in sorting out the issues and making your family stronger. You also always have the option of going with what you already suspect- the child is your husband's and your family's suspicions are just that, suspicions.

Which ever way you decide, I wish you the best. It shows that you care about your family and I think nothing but the best can come from that.

TherapistMarryAnn and 2 other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you