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Dr. Michael
Dr. Michael, Psychologist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 2177
Experience:  Licensed Ph.D. Clinical Health Psychology with 30 years of experience in private practive and as a clinical psychology university professor.
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Wonder if you could help, for as as i can remember my 6 year

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Hi wonder if you could help,
for as long as i can remember my 6 year old daughter has refused to do tasks i have asked, tells me no, swears at my 7 and 3 year old, will also start fights with them if she is upset or frustrated. Her last years school teacher also informed me then if she doesnt want to do something she will just sit there and ignore what the teacher is asking and asked for my help but to no avail she is very shy at times does not join in and her other peers parties she gets invited to, she will just sit at the table she spends ages sometimes lining her toys up and if 1 of her toys gets moved even a centimetre she will have a tantrum or if 1 falls over. Would there be anything at all i could try to do to break my daughter out of tis cycle i have tried talking to her but i just get no where.
Look forward to hearing from you thankyou
Hello. I believe I can be of help to you with this issue.

You need the guidance and assistance of someone with expertise in an area of psychology and special education called "applied behavior analysis" and behavior therapy. The proper specialist would spend time observing your daughter in the actual situations in which the problems occur and would document situational factors, antecedents and outcomes of her behavior, so as to identify things in the environment and behavioral responses of the adults/teachers she works with that might be effective. She might be placed on what is called a token system where increasingly, very small steps that represent compliance behavior is attended to. (As you are aware, most teachers and parent focus only on noncompliance and then react to that, rather than attending to and rewarding small acts of compliance). So, this is a very small example of what should be taking place. The specialist will coach parents and teachers in the importance of being consistent with her across school and home settings in terms of their focus on correcting certain behaviors, and in general parenting skills are improved. Based on your post, you probably know a good deal about the techniques that a behavior analysis expert would use. The problem is, situations in which parents and teachers are frustrated require a fresh re-evaluation of the situations by someone who is objective and knows what to look for.

I hope this information is helpful to you. Teachers, school psychologists and special education experts can provide you with the best referrals---they know who is really good at this in their locale.
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