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Ask Dr. Ed Wilfong Your Own Question
Dr. Ed Wilfong
Dr. Ed Wilfong, Psychologist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1528
Experience:  Twenty-five years treating all ages; Specialities: psychopharmacology & diagnosis, MMPI-2, testing.
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After recent councelling and admitting i had been sexually

Resolved Question:

After recent councelling and admitting i had been sexually abused as a child I now find myself unable to have sex with my husband and its getting progressively worse. Will therapy help me?
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Dr. Ed Wilfong replied 6 years ago.
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Dr. Ed Wilfong :

It will. It is very common to have a difficult time have sex with a spouse when issues about childhood sexual abuse. Counseling almost always helps, but may take a while (6-12 months). I recommend you keep husband at least a little informed (let him know why you are having trouble with sex and are working on it - he doesn't need all the horrible details), just so he doesn't think there are problems in the marriage.

Customer:

I had councelling for a year and while it was good for me it hasn't made the problems go away which is why i think Therapy maybe better for me and give me the tools to deal with my problem.

Customer:

I can't even bare to think about sex now and its driving me mad. When anyone makes a sexual joke or anything relating to sex is on TV or any other types media it just gives me a negative feeling.

Customer:

Isn't Therapy different from councelling? ,sorry if its the same thing, i thought it was different?

Dr. Ed Wilfong :

There really is no difference in counseling and therapy.

Dr. Ed Wilfong :

You may or may not want to change therapists, but please discuss it with therapist.

Dr. Ed Wilfong :

Given your age, you likely have kept this locked up for a long time, which usually means it is severe.

Dr. Ed Wilfong :

Did you just recently admit the abuse or have you been taking to counselor about it for a year.

Customer:

I talked about it with my councellor for a year but i don't see him anymore as it was a free service and feel other need the time. i could go back but was going to pay to see a therapist if it was going to help me more

Dr. Ed Wilfong :

The counselor thought other people needed the time?

Customer:

no, i came to the end of my sessions that the service offered but he said i could contiue and come back at any time. but there is always a long waiting list of people who need it too so never went back

Dr. Ed Wilfong :

OK. I would definately continue, but you may want to seek out someone in private sector. This can take a long time to work through. You have been traumatized a long time, but since geting worse , not better, I would try someone new.

Customer:

I really thought 'therapy' was different in that a therapist would suggest ways and stratagies to help rather than a councellor who just sits and listens to you. I don't know what to do now though. I want to get better, not just to talk about it all over again and just feelin the same. I'm probably expecting to much. Thanks for trying to help.

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