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Here goes. i met my boyfriend in a resturant. he was my

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here goes. i met my boyfriend...
here goes.
i met my boyfriend in a resturant. he was my manager for 2 years then when my ex and i broke up we starting hanging out alot. Wasn't allowed at this job so i left and found a new job. we where together for a year and a half and took some much needed time off from eachother. for about 2 months or so. We have been dating and hanging out every night again and it is so much better this time around. we have the best times together. He is very good with communication and me on the other hand can sit there and listen but don't know how to get what i'm feeling out. i want us to work more then anything. I need help learning how to express my feelings outloud and need to learn how to talk with him..please help me
Submitted: 8 years ago.Category: Mental Health
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Answered in 51 minutes by:
6/21/2010
Mental Health Professional: Dr. G., Psychologist replied 8 years ago
Dr. G.
Dr. G., Psychologist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1,570
Experience: Licensed Psychologist
Verified
What are you withholding from him? What would you like to say? What are your concerns about telling him?
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Customer reply replied 8 years ago

theres nothing that i'm holding back or dont want him to know.. i just don't know how to talk to people.. i hold everything in and usually just agree with people...he always talks about the future and things that bother him but i just don't know how to get anything out..i'm not worried about telling him anything because i know he cares for me

Mental Health Professional: Dr. G., Psychologist replied 8 years ago
I suggest looking up assertive communication techniques. What you are describing is a passive way of communicating and a deadly one at that. Now whenever something bothers you and you don't talk about it then your boyfriend is automatically going to assume it is something about him or the relationship. It is also bad for you because this is when harboring bad feelings and explosive anger outbursts take place with people who hold things in. If your google search for assertive communication techniques does not yield the answers you are looking for then you might want to touch base with a therapist to help you through this. Otherwise all I can offer is for you to practice little by little telling him things and see how he responds. But my guess is there is more to you then just not being able to communicate with people; hence the need to see a therapist. Good luck.
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