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Ask Kym Tolson, LCSW, CSAC, NBCCH Your Ow...
Kym Tolson, LCSW, CSAC, NBCCH, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 251
Experience:  Over 15 years of experience as a substance abuse therapist. I am a Licensed Clinical Social Worker
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I am worried about someone who is trying to contact me

Resolved Question:

I am worried about someone who is trying to contact me through my family. I knew him for about one year in college and it has been over 10 years since then. He has photos and writings about me on his website still. He once told me that he thought I would be his wife when I ran into him years after seeing him. He somehow found my parents house trying to find me he also called them a few times. My dad was short with him and he left. He just recently asked my husband and my mom, who he does not know, to be his facebook friend. What scared me is that he does not make any sense when he talks and his thoughts are completely delusional. He goes by two names and himself as two seperate people. He has made up his own delusional religion also. I am married with young children and I fear for my myself and my family and what he is capable of. What should I do?
Submitted: 7 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Kym Tolson, LCSW, CSAC, NBCCH replied 7 years ago.
Thank you for using What a scary situation to be in. I would suggest if he has any further contact with you or the family, clearly state to him in writing that you no longer wish to have contact with him nor do your family members. If they are contacted then they could set this boundary as well even through a facebook email if they accepted his friendship. It's best to be direct and clear and have it documented incase you need to have proof later. If he tries to contact you or your family after this, you could take your documentation and the fears you listed above to the local authorities and request a restraining order. If he violates that in any way you would be able to legally hold him accountable for this behaviors. If you notice him coming around or trying to be near you I would suggest the same method of setting a very assertive boundary with him and then following up with legal reinforcement if he makes any attempt at contact after that.

Other than this, there is not much you can do. Being sure to be clear in your desires about his lack of contact would be your best bet.

I hope this answer helps. Please let me know if you have any other questions or if you need further clarification of this answer.

Take care,
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