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cathy, Mental Health Professional
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1436
Experience:  MS., MS.Ed., 30 years clinical and administrative experience in psychiatry and mental health
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I am worried about my almost 12 yo grandson. He is

Resolved Question:

I am worried about my almost 12 yo grandson. He is agressive, and abusive to his younger siblings, using physical violence on them, uses foul language to his mother and others. He gets angry and out of control over small things. Has been suspended from school many times and is not doing as well as he should at school. As a baby and toddler he would bang his head into anything that was near. He is seeing a psychologist but not much improvement. I think there is something wrong and would like some advice on who to see PLEASE
Ailsa Harding Australia
Submitted: 7 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  cathy replied 7 years ago.

Hi yes Jac and I see.

I am glad he is seeing a therapist but it is impossible to say from the information you have given us here how to best guide you.

Can you give us a little more information so we can best help you?



Customer: replied 7 years ago.
What other information do you need
Expert:  cathy replied 7 years ago.

Hi Jac

1. was his labor and delivery within normal limits

2. were his early developmental milestones met

3. was he subjected to physical or sexual abuse

4. has he endured trauma such as parents divorcing

5. what was the modeling like when he was developing, eg, parents behavior

6. were drugs or alcohol present during pregnancy or early childhood

Lots more that can only be answered during a face to face eval.

I would think if he is already seeing a psychologist than you would have more to share?

why is he in therapy?

you have not told us this much



Customer: replied 7 years ago.

His labour was normal, milestones were met. He was scare by one of those talking fish things at about one year old but seemed to get over that in a few weeks. His parents separated just after his first birthday for a few months then re-united and a sister was born when he was 20 months old. There was alcohol in the family, many arguments. When he was about 4 the family moved to a rural property but again more fights and the parents separated after about another 18 months. The children stayed with the mother who was great for about 2 years then started drinking quite a lot. There were men friends and some moved in for a while . Another child , male,was born, prematurely at 6months. The father of that child moved on after many disagreements. There were other men and alcohol and 'pot' and undesirable female friends.

There was much animosity between the parents for several years and the children did not see much of their father. This has now changed and they get along OK the children spend part of each school holiday with their father. There is another man in the mothers life and he now lives with them. My granson tells him that he cannot tell him what to do as he is not his father. Yes there has been trauma in his life and a lot of insecurity. About 2 years ago,the police were called on several occasions to rowdy and unacceptable party behaviour and the dept of child safety were also called but have now closed the case. My granson seems to resent any authority and there seems to be a lack of ability to control his anger. His attention span seems to be shorter than it should be and he is easily frustrated which results in anger. The psychologist that he is seeing is very nice but after 10 visits there is little change and not mich information. I think he should be asessed for a physical or mental disorder before it is too late.

Customer: replied 7 years ago.
I would like to know if he needs to be asessed for both mental and physical problems . He is in therapy for the behaviour that I have described and in agreement with his school. Should we change to a psychiatrist and what sort of tests should we be asking for?
Customer: replied 7 years ago.
Relist: I cannot stay on line much longer and I just need to know what sort of tests we should be trying to get.
I cannot stay on line much longer and I just need to know what sort of tests we should be trying to get
Expert:  cathy replied 7 years ago.

Hi Jac and no psychiatrists dont test. Psychologists and psychotherapists test.

It sounds to me that your grandson has had a significant amount of childhood trauma.

He has had quite a chaotic childhood. His better bet is a therapist and not a psychiatrist.

If you are not happy with the current therapist, switch. Find a new therapist and take it from there. Having said that, given the amount of damage that you describe in his life I would not expect any improvement for several months.

I can understand your concern but this could take quite a long time to resolve.

Best wishes and warmest regards. Cathy

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