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I would like to ask about the line "just friends"

Customer Question
I would like to ask about the line "just friends"
Submitted: 7 years ago.Category: Mental Health
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Answered in 11 minutes by:
2/22/2010
Mental Health Professional: Kym Tolson, LCSW, CSAC, NBCCH, Therapist replied 7 years ago
Kym Tolson, LCSW, CSAC, NBCCH
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 251
Experience: Over 15 years of experience as a substance abuse therapist. I am a Licensed Clinical Social Worker
Verified
Hi there,
Thank you for using Justanswer.com. Do you have a specific question about it? I can try to help.

Awaiting your question,
Kym
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Customer reply replied 7 years ago

Yes I do, but it is a long story.

I got that line given to me by a friend, because she was told by a friend that I was attacted to her. I have never made advances to her. I have helped her on many occasions, but she just blurted this line out to me, and has since made herself distant.

So I am confused as to why she would do this.

Mental Health Professional: Kym Tolson, LCSW, CSAC, NBCCH, Therapist replied 7 years ago
Hi and thanks for your question.
Honestly, I think this means that she heard you were attracted to her and she didn't know how to respond to it. I think her saying "I just want to be friends" was a way of telling you she isn't interested in a relationship. Sounds like she assumed the friend was telling the truth, that you were attracted to her, and she wanted to let you know she wanted to stay friends. She probably feels uncomfortable now because she didn't know for sure that you are attracted to her and she said the friends line anyway. So she is staying away because she is embarrassed that she jumped the gun or she is trying to really give you the message that she just wants to be friends.

I hope this answer helps. All the best and please let me know if you have any other questions.

Take care,
Kym
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Customer reply replied 7 years ago

She has alot of issues.

she is divorced with 1 child, running a small business.

Do u think this might be influencing her choice. Or she generally do not find me attractive?

She told me I am very dear dear friend.

Is there hope in the future or am I miss reading the signs

Mental Health Professional: Kym Tolson, LCSW, CSAC, NBCCH, Therapist replied 7 years ago
Hi again,
Honestly, I think if someone was interested they would make time regardless of the business and child. There might be hope though. I would suggest telling her honestly how you feel and asking if she thinks of you as more than a dear friend. That is the only way to know for sure.

I hope this helps as well.

Take care,
Kym
Kym Tolson, LCSW, CSAC, NBCCH
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 251
Experience: Over 15 years of experience as a substance abuse therapist. I am a Licensed Clinical Social Worker
Verified
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Kym Tolson, LCSW, CSAC, NBCCH
Kym Tolson, LCSW, CSAC, NBCCH
Kym Tolson, LCSW, CSAC, NBCCH, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 251
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Experience: Over 15 years of experience as a substance abuse therapist. I am a Licensed Clinical Social Worker

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