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Dr. G.
Dr. G., Psychologist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1523
Experience:  Licensed Psychologist.
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I am a grandmother of 2 boys ages 10 and 3. Our daughter has

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I am a grandmother of 2 boys ages 10 and 3. Our daughter has been going through a messy divorce and our son in law is out of control. His behavior over time has escalated. Everyone who had known him before he has disconnected from. He lost a lot of weight very quickly and was involved in some criminal activity that involved large sums of money. Many people have tried to reach out to him and help but he has shut everyone out. He also over the years has collected guns and keeps them in a safe. He is not a hunter. He has been verbally abusive to our daughter so much so that she no longer can have a conversation with him at all. The boys have a very hard time going to visit their dad. Our daughter does not even know where he lives she just drops them off at a agreed upon location on Friday night without speaking to him and picks them up on Sunday night at the same location. We are very concerned about the boys welfare. I need to know your professional opinion.
Thanks for your help
I think getting the children into therapy might be a good start but I also have other concerns. Your daughter needs to stand up to this man and set boundaries. Whenever a person stops doing something they know is good because it might make another person mad is going to lead to trouble. Your daughter does not stand up to him because it might ruffle his feathers. Huge mistake and a good way to perpetuate the problem. If there is child neglect or harm involved then this needs to be documented and either taken back to court or go through social services. As far as visitation, you can't stop him from visitation if it is court-ordered. As the grandparent, you should continue o play an active role in the boys' lives and keep a lookout for anything that might not be going right with them. Document this, as well as your daughter should, and gather your case to take back to court. If the children are in danger then by all means she should not let them visit their father.
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