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Dr. Steve
Dr. Steve, Psychologist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 370
Experience:  19 years conducting therapy; book author; newspaper columnist; former co-host of radio show
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I always feel aggravated and the littliest things seem to

Customer Question

i always feel aggravated and the littliest things seem to upset me and get me flustered. I am not happy with my car, my job or my relationship and i get frusrtated and snap and yell when something little happens sometimes. I am losing my patience too easily. I used to have a great relationship and I am a positive thinker. Since my job of 7 years has been ok, but not paying enough to stay above the bills, I FEEL like a failure, and my sex life is also suffered imenesly. I guess I need counsiling?
Submitted: 7 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Dr. Steve replied 7 years ago.
Hi dragon:

Okay... hang on. You have a lot of things going on in your life, and I can tell you are feeling overwhelmed by them. A lot of difficult decisions have to be made relatively soon, and when this stress is coupled with the ambient stress of financial worries, it can be a bit much.

And I think you already understand that every one of the symptoms you mentioned are right in line with masculine depression. When men get depressed, they don't tend to get frumpy or lethargic - trahter, they get snarky. They get angry, aggressive, grousy... sort of like the Grinch (to follow the holiday theme for one last day). However, the cycle you are in right now may or may not be directly related to the environment, as you may have the type of depression that comes and goes. Of course, all of the stressors you named could have triggered it again.

So the direct answer to your question is... the counseling would surely help you. The research has consistently said two things: (1) depression (and anxiety) are absolutely treatable conditions, and treatment will make a subjectively notable difference, and (2) the best treatment option is a combination of medication plus therapy. Your goal with medicine is to not be on it forever. Rather, it is to stabilize your neurochemistry so that the changes you discuss in therapy can have a better chance of gaining traction. Not a necessary condition, though - therapy alone can also make a great difference.

Oh - and if you didn't like the anti-depressants in the past, maybe speak with the therapist about why you specifically did not like them. You may be able to go on a different one and avoid some of the negative effects you felt the first time. Particularly sexual side-effects, men don't like to mess with that aspect of their lives. There are medical options that can help with that aspect.

If you are satisfied with your answer, please hit “ACCEPT” so that I may receive credit. Feedback is also appreciated.


Dr. Steve

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Customer: replied 7 years ago.


Thanks for your insight I think I will be pursuing both treatments.

Expert:  Dr. Steve replied 7 years ago.
Fantastic, Dragon! Best of luck to you-
Dr. Steve