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Norman M.
Norman M., Principal psychotherapist in private practice. Newspaper contributor, over 2000 satisfied clients on JA
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 2568
Experience:  ADHP(NC), DEHP(NC), ECP, UKCP Registered.
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You must of hear this story a million times, how ever I am

Customer Question

You must of hear this story a million times, how ever I am desperate and alone with this problem!!!!
My son of 26 is a heavy skunk user and has been for 11 yrs. I have had him arrested, taken to court, rehoused him in a flat unteen times. Now he is back living at home as his father fears that he can't cope any more, and my life is a misery.
Christophers behavior is that he wont work, due to he panics even going to the job centre, which i dont believe, a compulsive eatter, so now obese, hits his father constantly if he doesn't jump when he says,and would love me to die, leave home, or hit me.. Our home is wrecked ,so badly that i will not let anyone visit me, and the tale goes on
My husband due to his fear buys the skunk for him 6 times a week and he is an excise officer who could lose his job if found out. at the age of 52 this would wreck his job, and we could become destitute. my husband wont talk about it, and in denial, but i am in a state of mind where I want to leave, but cant
Submitted: 8 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Norman M. replied 8 years ago.
I'm really sorry to hear this, what a terrible thing to cope with. First of all, get this boy out of the house. NOW. Call the police, get him arrested and out of the way. Sorry, it is a hard thing to do. If you don't. NOTHING will change. Why should he change - he is getting all he needs. If he can't take care of himself - tough for him. As things are, he could wreck the family.

You need some support. and I suggest that you get in touch with a therapist as soon as posssible, preferably someone who does Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. You need space to talk this over with someone who can be objective and won't judge you.

You might want to consider telling your husband that either the boy goes or you do, if you really can't take it any more. Tell him to keep the skunk out of the house or he will land up inside. He'snot doing the boy and favors, and frankly, it's time he stood up to him.