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JR, M.A.
JR, M.A., Mental Health Professional
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 184
Experience:  I have a master's degree in clinical psychology and am currently finishing my doctoral degree.
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How can I stop my "enabling"my soon to be 30 yr. old

Resolved Question:

How can I stop my "enabling"my soon to be 30 yr. old daughter, but not my grand children ?
Submitted: 8 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Customer: replied 8 years ago.
Optional Information:
Age: 53; Female, Texas
Already Tried:
Cut off the "borrowing" of money. Last week let her know she is not welcome in my house. She & my grandchildren were staying with us, because of no utilities again in their house. Can't take her drinking, neglect of the kids, & especially her total disrespect & expectations of what I am susposed to provide for her.
Expert:  JR, M.A. replied 8 years ago.
Hi tx lady,

Unfortunately, this type of situation is becoming increasingly common among people your daughter's age. You are right in cutting off the money and asking her to leave the house. If you help her, you are just making it possible for her to continue the same self-destructive pattern. Her sense of entitlement is also pretty normal for substance abusers. She expects everything and gives very little in return. If you truly feel as though she is neglecting the children and they are in danger, you might consider filing a law suit to take the kids away from her until she gets her life back on track. I know this might require a tremendous sacrifice for you, but those children have to be a priority in this situation. I suggest that you contact a family law attorney and talk about the possible options you have at your disposal.

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