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My ex wife now filed for divorce on the grounds of

My ex wife now...

My ex wife now filed for divorce on the grounds of abandonment. i did leave because i came home from work early and she was laying on top of another guy. and i never got any court dates or anything she sent me a picture of the judgement papers

Lawyer's Assistant: What steps has your ex-wife taken? Has she filed any papers in family court?

Yes there filed and everything its all done i feel there is no hope

Lawyer's Assistant: Family law varies by state. What state is she in?

Sc

Lawyer's Assistant: Anything else you want the lawyer to know before I connect you?

Yes she filed abandonment because she wanted custody of my son.

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Answered in 1 minute by:
3/26/2018
Legal Eagle
Legal Eagle, Lawyer
Category: Legal
Satisfied Customers: 10,280
Experience: Licensed to practice before state and federal court
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Hello! I am a licensed attorney, admitted to practice in state and federal court. I have a nearly 100% satisfaction rating (click here for more info) so all that means is that you can count on me to help today.

Please keep in mind that our conversation does not include an attorney-client relationship and this is for general information purposes only. What specific questions did you have? I have an idea about your situation, but I don’t want to make any assumptions.

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Customer reply replied 28 days ago
my ex wife filed for a divorce on grounds of abandonment. i did leave but i came home from work early and she was a sleep with another guy on my couch. also she made it difficult for me to stay. she hit me and also was with holding sex for about 5 months

I'm very sorry to hear about that. That must be extremely difficult to deal with. What questions did you have about that?

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Customer reply replied 28 days ago
well she already filed the divorce i did move with my dad for 2 months got my own place. i ran into a financial problem. and lost my apartment. and decicided to change careers and become a truck driver. i ended up moving back to ohio where i was born trying to get on my feet. all the divorce is finalized and claimed abandonment. not sure what i can do from here

I'm sorry about that. Have you responded to her divorce petition yet?

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Customer reply replied 28 days ago
i havent gotten anything she claims she doesnt know where i am

I see. Have you provided her with your address at all?

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And do you know what county the divorce petition was filed in?

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Customer reply replied 28 days ago
i did. but she claims i didnt

I see.

And do you know what county the divorce petition was filed in?

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Customer reply replied 28 days ago
aiken county sc

Thanks for that. Ok, so the most immediate thing you should do is look at the Aiken County's Family Courthouse website to see if your name shows up in a search. You can also call them if they don't have a website set up to see if the divorce petition has actually been filed and when.

The first thing that is important to do is to respond to the lawsuit (A petition for divorce is basically a lawsuit). Most jurisdictions require that you respond within 20-30 days after the lawsuit is filed, meaning there isn’t a lot of time to do so. Most people just reiterate the claims being made and then state that they “Deny all claims raised by plaintiff/petitioner” after each claim.. Keep in mind that even if you are responding to a lawsuit, most courts require a filing fee. The court will stamp that the docs have been received. The court will keep one copy of the received document and the court will give you back stamped copies of the others (one for you to keep and one for you to serve).

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In the meantime, the court will set up court dates like the case management conference (where the parties update the court as to the process of the case). You will also have a chance to conduct “discovery” with the other party. The basic discovery process is a good tool for people involved in a lawsuit to find out information the other party has. For example, this is the time where you can ask her about her assets to determine whether spousal support should be owed.

Discovery usually can’t begin until about 10-14 days after filing the initial complaint, depending on your jurisdiction. Through the discovery process you can usually a) request documents to help your case; b) conduct a deposition (which is a formal interview of certain parties); c) request admissions to certain things so there is less time wasted at a potential trial.

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Regardless, sometimes, just settling the matter is the easiest thing to do. It doesn't always appear as if it's the easiest thing to do, but every single day lawyers across the country are explaining to their clients that if they just work on settling their legal disputes in a way that makes sense for them and they are going to be in a better position in the long-term.

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Customer reply replied 28 days ago
there already filed and done. yes i understand that. but she has custody of my son that is not her biological son. i dont feel he is in any danger. but i left him there so i could get things better and be able to provide better for him.now she has custody.

So, the divorce has already been completed? And you're sure of this? Also, is your main issue with getting custody of the child? Is it your child biologically?

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Customer reply replied 28 days ago
the divorce is completed im sure of it, my main issue is getting custody of my biological child back.

Understood. Thank you for clarifying

If you are looking to modify custody, visitation, or child support, you’ll have to go through the court system. It typically starts with filing a petition, which is just a request through the courts to get a change in one of those things. Once you fill out the petition, you should make three copies: one to you, one for the court, and one to the other party. It is critical to understand that the courts are bound to look at what is in the best interests of the child above all else. This means they will look into who and how the child’s health, education, welfare, and safety are best going to be served. Sometimes, this can be inconvenient for one parent, but because the kids cannot protect themselves, the court takes it upon itself to protect them. The bright side is that if you understand this in advance, then you will have an edge when you are dealing with the other side because you’ll be seeing this process through the court’s eyes.

The jurisdiction is proper where the child lives so be sure to understand that. Just make sure that you're available for whatever hearings they have and can prove that you can be a better parent.

Did you have any other questions for me today that I could help you with?

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Customer reply replied 28 days ago
through all of this i had the best intentions of my child i didnt want to drag him through the separation i was the one starting over from ground zero.

I can understand. It's a tough situation to be in, but keep in mind that a little bit of trouble now can save you a lot later and you can do more to be in your son's life.

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Customer reply replied 28 days ago
thanks man!! i understand

The pleasure is all mine! Unless you have additional questions, there’s just a few other things I’d like you to know before we wrap up this conversation:

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Customer reply replied 28 days ago
i should file a petiton with the courts?

Yes. To officially get custody or visitation, that's what you have to do.

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Customer reply replied 28 days ago
how is that done?

The best thing to do is to call the court and ask them for the forms they have to file a custody petition. Usually, the court has certain forms. After that, fill them out and make three copies and serve them on the mother.

I usually recommend they go to www.thumbtack.com and find a process server. A process server is a person who will serve a copy of the lawsuit on the other party. A process server must be at least 18 years old and not involved in the case in any way. If the filing party has a friend or family member who can do it, they can serve it for them, too. Otherwise, most process servers charge something like 50-100 dollars. Once service is complete, the process server will typically have to file a “proof of service” form to swear to the court that they filed the documents.

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Customer reply replied 28 days ago
thank you so much
The pleasure is all mine. Would you mind providing me a positive rating today?
Legal Eagle
Legal Eagle, Lawyer
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