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Sorry about last night. My computer died in the middle of me…

Hello, sorry about last night...
Hello, sorry about last night. My computer died in the middle of me tying my story to you and I had no way of getting back online.So, I wanted to tell you the details of my situation to really get personalized advice about what I should do.Last year i had an affair with my neighbor(s) wife. I know, really stupid thing to do, and I'm regretting it BIG TIME now. Anyway, the affair was discovered just after Christmas of last year. My wife was furious with me and her husband,(We'll call him Steve) was also very upset. On December 30th he entered my house through an unlocked door and atacked me in my bedroom. We called the police and the came out to talk to us. They said I could press charges, butI was hoping to deescalate the situation and just wanted to make sure it didn't happen again. They suggested I get a restraining order against Steve. On January 2nd I went to the Torrance courthouse and filed the paperwork to get the restraining order. My court date was set for Jan. 19tth. I used the court's process service to have Steve served. They tried 3 times and he either didn't answer his door or his wife answered and said he wasn't home. So, Jan 19th rolls around and I went to the courthouse and filed for a continuance since he hadn't been served. My new court date was set for Feb 4th. In the meantime Steve and I had a discussion and he apologized for attacking me and I apologized for the affair. We agreed that we weren't ever going to be friends, but it wouldn't work to be enemies since we live 3 doors apart in the same building. At that point I felt more comfortable witth the situation and in the next few days I got the letter from the court deputies that Steve had, again, not been served the restraining order papers. Since we'd talked and they'd again failed to serve him, I thought why should I bother going to my court date on the 4th, since this doesn't seem to be working and I think things have settled down anyway.Well, fast-forward to Feb 24th. My parents come for a visit to celebrate a very late Christmas, since we visited my wife's family in December. Steve sees my paerent's and "snaps" He starts yelling, "Did you know your son's bee f**king my wife?!!" I was inside my house, taking a shower, so I fortunately missed the actual event. He eventually stopped yelling and started to head back to his house. My wife came out to help my parents into our house, when Steve came back and started yelling again and blocked my 77 year old father from coming up our walkway. My wife got in Steve's face and was telling him to leave them alone and he started yelling at her. My wife said she could'nt hol back and she slapped Steve. Stev then slapped my wife back. My dad tried to get in between them and Steve knocked my dad down and my dad scrapped his knee. My Older son was there and he's a highway patrolman. My son got steve in and arm hold and Steve stopped and went back to his house. We called the police and so did Steve. The police came out and talked to us. They went to talk to Steve and he was so aggresive with them that they had to handcuff him, just to talk to him. The police said that we could have him taken to jail, but that since my wife struck him first that he could press charges and she would have to be taken in too. We didn't want my 8 year old to see his mom being handcuffed and taken to jail, so their suggestion was a restraining order. I told them, "I've tried that" and they asked if I had the restraining order available and they would serve him the papers right now. When I found the paperwork, they looked at it and said that since the court date on the 4th had come and gone that the restraing order was now longer valid. They said to go asap and file another restraing order and that if I called them, they would serve him and make sure he got served. I went to the courthouse again and started a new restraing order. I brought it home and then called the Redondo Beach police dept. They said they would send someone out to talk to me, but before anyone arrived, a watch commander called me back and said that the RBPD doesn't serve court papers; the court's deputies do that." So, I took the papers back down to the courthouse and gave them to the deputies there. My new court date is April 4th. About a week later, I get a phone call from Steve's wife, trying to broker a peace deal, saying, "All we want is to peacefully co-exist, and to be able to let my son play in the driveway shared by all the units in our building, etc." I said, "That's what we want too, but the last time we tried this Steve broke our agreement and attacked my parents". A few days later Steve's wife and my wife had a discussion and Steve's wife told my wife that Steve doesn't want the restraining order because it will affect his work. Apparently he does some work with the government and he said he'll not be able to do that if he has a restraining order against him.
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Answered in 4 hours by:
3/24/2018
Bill Attorney
Category: Legal
Satisfied Customers: 2,042
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Thank You for your following up with me.

Under the circumstances it seems that you are justified in requesting a new restraining order against your neighbor, this will allow him to be arrested should an instance should as that happened when your parents visited occur again.

There would be grounds for police to arrest and charge without the need if also arresting another party to the argument as it was your wife in the last instance.

It seems they could have charged both your wife and neighbor under public order offenses/ assault.

Restraining orders would show on civil records rather than criminal history in a background check as there is no offense committed in relation to a civil restraining order so his employment is unlikely to be effected.

There is always the option of modifying or terminating the order in the future if you ever see eye to eye again, that is once you have the order in place.

If he is refusing service you can proceed to serving by certified mail or request the judge to allow alternate service.

Thanks again for your request.

I'm an independent legal expert and rely on your positive feedback today to get a credit for my time.

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FIVE STARS or your rating is much appreciated in this regard.

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Attorney Bill

Bill Attorney
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Customer reply replied 1 month ago
Thank you Bill. I just have a couple of questions more, if that’s ok?
Customer reply replied 1 month ago
He’s hired a lawyer to go to court with him. Is it foolish for me to not have a lawyer representing me also?

Well if the matter and evidence you have is concrete then you should prevail without a lawyer; it is always advantageous to have a lawyer who is dedicated to your case but not required.

You are entitled to proceed pro se and it is common in these cases to self-represent oneself and the court is this in relation to civil restraining orders as the case is limited to a narrative of violence and threatening behavior.

You should make a list of witnesses, events, documents and other evidence and ensure these turn up at the hearing.

Best

Attorney Bill

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