After a year of dating distance (NY to Texas) and both
After a year of dating long distance (NY to Texas) and both people committing to live together when he retired in the Fall and to his land off the grid in Alaska my boyfriend "discarded" me. I say discard because I have since found out that he has NPD. The day I arrived in May he said he loved me, how we were going to make it work in Alaska, had I packed up my apartment. Two days later he said "now that we know how we are going to do it, I need you to go home". Normally I stay 2-6 weeks, he gets upset when I leave. I was surprized and asked why. He claimed he was getting busy at work and wanted to just stay on track without any distractions. I said I would stay out of his way, do what you have to, but I enjoy the peace and serenity there and could I stay. He was actually excited about that and said :great now we can start over". Like many things that happened during the relationship, I didn't understand what he meant and I didn't question him. I told him I was going to visit national parks and left for three days. When I returned there was a woman sitting and talking to him in his house. Thought it was a friend. He said he had taken all my belongings and brought them to park headquarters. The woman left and apologized to me. I'm in shock and crying, he goes outside and makes a phonecall. Then he comes in the house and says"I'm afraid of you". I'm like what?? WHat is going on? Next thing, the neighbor who is a state trooper is at the door, I invite him in and he says no come out. I go outside and the park supervisor and two rangers were also there. Superintendent read me something about being in private federal park area and wasn't allowed. I said you know me, I've been back and forth for a year! He said no not really. I got my stuff and left. He told me to wait to open the paper he gave me. It was a criminal trespass warning signed by my boyfriend and served by the trooper. Very sorry for all this info BUT what I am trying to make clear is I didn't do anything, I couldn't understand what /why he was doing this. We were supposed to get married. I manage to get back to NY and friend tells me to look up NPD. It explained everything. Everything from the verbal abuse, etc. to the lying that he loved me right up until the end. Not going to bore you further with NPD description but this is their m.o. when they "discard" you. So I have been thinking. According to this page "for what reasons can a criminal trespass warning be issued in Texas? Whenever an officer feels one is necessary. It is at the discretion of the officer. Can a property owner or manager have one issued just because they don't like someone, or just because they want to issue it? A restaurant can request that an officer come over and take a look. This is nothing official. The officer simply did this as a warning for you to stay away. The restaurant has the right to ask someone to leave or not to enter. What if you have one issued against you and you know for a solid fact that you have done nothing wrong, but you do know that the warning was issued purely because of someone else's false claims? Because this is only a warning and nothing else, this is really a moot point. If you want to, you can sue the restaurant for defamation for the exaggerated claims of threat to the officer. However, whether or not you wish to do this is up to you." I have no idea what he told the trooper. If I am reading this right, my boyfriend had no legal right to file a warning without a verifiable cause made by an officer. … read more
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