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I currently have an attorney for my divorce, but have some…

Customer Question
I currently have an...

I currently have an attorney for my divorce, but have some concerns. My soon to be ex assaulted me and he cannot come within 300 ft of me, home, or work and the case is still pending. He has a hearing on 25 Oct. So I found out last week my attorney and his attorney have not filed anything with the court and are trying to mediate it between each other. My soon to be ex has the nerve to fight for custody for our 2 boys. He is only doing it to hurt me. Why would my attorney not want to take this to court. Wouldn't it be better, faster and easier to be done and over with while he has a criminal charge against him??

Lawyer's Assistant: Because family law varies from place to place, can you tell me what state this is in?

North Dakota

Lawyer's Assistant: Have you talked to a lawyer yet?

Only mine. I try to see others, but the wait time is 2-3 weeks for a consultation.

Lawyer's Assistant: Anything else you want the lawyer to know before I connect you?

Thats it.

Submitted: 9 months ago.Category: Legal
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Answered in 1 minute by:
9/19/2017
Lawyer: LegalKnowledge, Attorney replied 9 months ago
LegalKnowledge
LegalKnowledge, Attorney
Category: Legal
Satisfied Customers: 31,877
Experience: 10+ years handling Legal, Real Estate, Criminal Law, Family Law, Traffic matters.
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Hi! I will be the professional that will be helping you today. I look forward to providing you with information to help with your question and concern

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Lawyer: LegalKnowledge, Attorney replied 9 months ago

Good morning. The reason may be because mediation is required, before going before the Judge and letting them decide. With most divorces, mediation is required, in an attempt to get the parties to try and resolve all or some of the issues, which are present. Now, if this can not be worked out, a Judge can step in and have the final say and based it upon the best interest of the children. As such, there are steps which must be followed first and keep in mind, that mediation is not binding.

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Customer reply replied 9 months ago
Wait a minute, so you are telling me that what I am going through is not binding because it has not been brought to the court? Why would an attorney NOT want to bring it to court if my soon to be ex assaulted me and has a criminal charge pending?? He also has a restraining order and cannot come within 300 ft of me, the house, or my work.
Lawyer: LegalKnowledge, Attorney replied 9 months ago

Mediation is not binding. If the attorneys are trying to mediate this on their own and can come to an agreement and resolve this, an order can be submitted to the Judge to sign off of

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Lawyer: LegalKnowledge, Attorney replied 9 months ago

Once your attorney feels as though no progress can be made, they can advance the case and address these issues with the court and present evidence, for the Judge to consider.

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Customer reply replied 9 months ago
Why would my attorney not want to file it with the court if my soon to be ex is pending criminal charges for assault? Please explain that one for me!
Customer reply replied 9 months ago
Ok, so ultimately they try to resolve it without the court? This did not happen in my first divorce of 10 years. it was filed with the court immediately.
Lawyer: LegalKnowledge, Attorney replied 9 months ago

What do you want him to file with the court? The State handles the criminal charges, so your attorney can use this when proceeding, depending on what the issue is and what they are filing for. You shared that he wants custody and you are objecting, so it will be up to the Judge to decide and when that happens, all relevant evidence will be presented, to show why it is in the best interest of the children, to remain with you. Ideally, the parties try and resolve it on their own. Sometimes it works out and sometimes it does not. If you tell the attorney you want them to respond within X number of days and agree or else you will move forward, you can instruct them to do so. Your attorney needs to communicate with you, regarding their plan and strategy, so you are on the same page and know what is going on.

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Customer reply replied 9 months ago
Is it not beneficial for it to go to court if one party is under investigation for assault?
Lawyer: LegalKnowledge, Attorney replied 9 months ago

It is a relevant factor for the Judge to consider, when deciding custody and can be used as a basis, to deny the fathers request, if there is domestic violence and it happened in front of the children and/or the father is a risk or threat to them. Your attorney may be trying to get the other side to agree to something, to save time, effort and cost but if they refuse, it can go before the Judge. Why wait weeks for something to be heard if hopefully they can reach in agreement in a few days. If your position is firm, on not giving him custody, you can consider visitation and see if he will accept that, with his attorney sharing with him what his chances are and if it is even worth fighting over.

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Lawyer: LegalKnowledge, Attorney replied 9 months ago

I just wanted to follow up and see if you had any other questions or needed me to clarify something. I am here to help, so please let me know. Thanks!

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Customer reply replied 9 months ago
What helps me more??? It going to court with his criminal charges or just trying to work it out through mediation? BE HONEST!!!
Lawyer: LegalKnowledge, Attorney replied 9 months ago

If you know that there is no chance you will agree to allowing him to have shared custody and want full custody, there is no point in trying to mediate it UNLESS it is court ordered. As I shared, you MAY have to do this if ordered by the Judge and as a condition to the divorce, so you may not have a choice. I think if you can speak with your attorney and give them something reasonable to present, you may be able to resolve this but if not, it is going to be decided by the Judge.

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Customer reply replied 9 months ago
you do not understand. He is trying to fight me for FULL CUSTODY!!!! I explained this in my initial response. ugh....
Lawyer: LegalKnowledge, Attorney replied 9 months ago

Yes, I do understand. If you are refusing, there is nothing to mediate. You do not want to give it up and he wants it. As such, the Judge will decide, as I shared above, If your attorney is trying to mediate this, you need to ask them what they are working on, since you are refusing. It makes no sense to waste time, when it will be up to the Judge

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