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I have a question to ask. I was dating a man from US. I live…

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Hello, I have a question to ask. I was dating a man from US. I live in europe. We met at the beginning of 2014 and he was married than. You could say that we where in the same work circle. We both work in business aviation. First 8 months it was just texts, but as I am 34 years old now, i do not and didn't than had a time to have a relationship with a married man. And I was very clear about it. In autumn 2014 he was offered a job in the company where I was working that time and where he use to work (several years before). By that time from he's words he got divorced. So he joined our operation and he became my captain. This operation was single crew (3 pilots and me as only flight attendant), we started flying from beginning of november. At the beginning it was very confusing cos I really liked him. So in about 1 month we kept it as strictly work environment, the thing you need to understand that we always had mutual breakfast, dinners, tours in new countries and etc. At the end of november we where in Thailand and we started became closer to each other. While it was all platonic all our conversation where about relationships, what was between us all this time since we first met and etc. So we both new where we stand. At the beginning of december he told me that he thinks that its time for our first date and that he changed all he's new years plans cos he would like to do it with that special person. He's schedule was 2 moths on 1 moth off, but mine was always on. So unfortunately that time christmas and new years we were apart, but we flew to New York at the beginning of january and as he said that he lives in Pittsfield, MA he drove to New York to spend time with me. By that time all our colleagues and company new about us- he personally called company to say that we are serious and its is not a fling. Everything continued several months and we started making plans for future, how I should move to US and start living together and etc. As I was madly in love I wanted to do something nice for my man so I bought for him lots of expensive presents (cos I was so into him, and from he's words I was so different from all the others women that he dated.) Its a way to long story about he's relationship with he's wife and other girlfriends before/after/during her. From he's colleagues words he was always a bit strange - but as he was super smart it was just he's weirdness. I have a master degree in psychology and I knew that he is "special/odd", but it was very attractive in sick way. Summer 2015 he started to behave very strange and started disappear, at one point he decided that he doesn't want to be pilot anymore so me as supportive girlfriend said what ever you decide I will be there for you and etc. Anyhow In June he disappear and when he finally appear he told that "during filing he's divorce papers was made a mistake" and legally he is still married. Again supportive girlfriend said what do you want to do - as he's "wife" now wanted full life support alimony on % from all he's businesses and etc - I said that if he wants fight with her and go to court I will support, he said no - I will give her everything what she wants cos it is stopping us to make a new step in our relationship. So he was suppose to meet a lawyer and etc. and again disappeared. Saying that he needs to digest - of course it was hard for both of us so I understood. After 2 weeks of silence finally I was loosing it and demanded Skype (because by that time I had been on my suitcases 3 months to go to US and spend a summer there and find apartment, where we could start our family), and when I saw him thru Skype I had a strange feeling that the huge bomb is just on its way- and i was right. He said to me that he got a call from he's previous "girlfriends" and apparently he has a 6 moths old baby girl. And of course he was "shock" and etc - I was speechless , he claimed that he has filed a blood test and he waits results. I took a time to cool off and to think - and as he presented that he didn't knew anything about the baby and etc (that he is only innocent victim) I told him that whatever he decided I am there for him and we will solve it together . PS: By that time you must think that I am idiot :) After a week all this messed up news I received a letter from him that you deserve so much more and relationships aren't his priority and etc. And he broke up with me.
3 months after that I find out that he did got divorced from first wife 2014 summer, but between summer and Nov. he got married again to a new wife and they where expecting.
So he was feeding me with lies all this time deliberately, and he stole 1 year from my life and also about 6000 euros of presents. This was made all in conscious. I have contacted him and asked to return in money all this amount that I spent on him, cos there was not a single truth about him and he used and humiliated me. He says that he's jobless and broke. is there a civil case based on that. Virzinja
Submitted: 2 years ago.Category: Legal
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Answered in 2 hours by:
2/25/2016
Lawyer: Nishan Parlakian,
 replied 2 years ago
Nishan Parlakian
Category: Legal
Satisfied Customers: 56
Experience: Principal at Consumer Law Office of Nishan Parlakian, Esq.
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Hello Virzinja, I am very sorry for your problem with this troubled person. There are no cases that I could find in the Federal dockets that would support an action against him. That does not mean that cases have not been brought to any court but dismissed later because there was no law that he violated or no grounds to bring a remedy for a civil cause of action. This all means that being a jerk will not bring you a winning lawsuit-that I could find. I'm sure that you can guess that from what you hove written that everyone goes into relationships with their open. But I can offer this. In the US it is an old saying that anyone can sue anyone else for just about anything. There is nothing to stop you from going to the "small claims court" where he lives and filing suit against him by yourself. The small claims court does nit look at the law the way that other major courts do and you can plead your case to a judge. You would go to court, pay a filing fee. The reason for the suit would be negligence in that he should have been more careful in taking your gifts under false pretenses. Fraud that induced you to spend money on him causing you damages of money (do not mention the broken heart), and defamation, causing you embarrassment and humiliation because your place of business was alerted to your fraudulent relationship by him. It was a lie perpetrated by him. That might possibly work-an at least you get to drag him into court in front of a judge. But no, there is no way that I can see where you can send him packing off to jail. Again I'm sorry. Don't spend to much time and any more money even to get this loser. Best, Sean

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