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Sam, Attorney at Law
Category: Legal
Satisfied Customers: 27011
Experience:  More than 20 years of experience practicing law.
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I have been in a 14 year relationship with my boyfriend. He

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I have been in a 14 year relationship with my boyfriend. He is very controlling, and the psychological abuse that I've been enduring is unbearable. I tried so hard to make it work for the sake of my daughter but I'm just done being treated like an imbolent. I've tried going to college and finishing a nursing degree, but he's done so much to put strain on it. I've tried to leave, going to talk groups, but never getting a real answer or help in what to do. I have been working 2 full time jobs, trying to get out of debt so it is easier to leave him and pay off all credit that is in both names. We own a home that we have both worked on in making home improvements, usually that is where my tax returns go to. My bf does not pay his bills on time, I usually have to do it for him, I tried talking about this house, because I am scared and I don't know how to get my name off the mortgage, he made it clear that he will not leave the house, but when we got the mortgage he couldn't get it in just his name so we bought it together. How do I get my name off the mortgage if he is unwilling to sell it together and he can't afford to keep it on his own? I'm scared if I leave that I will be stuck paying for a mortgage and will not be able to afford a place on my own for me and my daughter or he will not pay anything and I'll be stuck paying for a place I don't even reside in anymore. He does things to me that make it feel like it's impossible to leave and even threatening me with our daughter. I'm sorry for talking in circles but I'm so distraught and unhappy. I just can't bear this life anymore. I would appreciate any help in this situation. Thank you

I am an attorney with more than 25 years of experience and I look forward to providing you with information in this regard today

I am sorry you have been in this situation.

I suggest you tell you BF that you want him to buy you out of the home, or agree to put it up for sale so that you to can go about your way OR you will have no choice but to go to court and Petition to have the court order the sale of the home. The fact that you are on the mortgage should not tie you to his dreaded ways for the rest of your life.

If you have been to domestic violence support groups, I suggest that you may want to talk to them to see if they have legal on retainer who can assist you in preparing such a Petition as a discount rate.

Other than the BF agreeing to the sale or having the Court Order it, there is no way to get off of the mortgage.

I am not sure what threats you are referring to about your daugher, as I dont see where you set detail in that regard. But please fill me in and I can provide further information in that regard.

My goal is to provide you with excellent service – if you feel you have received anything less, please reply back as I am happy to address follow-up questions. Kindly rate me when you are done.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

Thank you for your answer. I guess I will have to take him to court to take my name off the mortgage. I know he is going to do whatever it takes to make the situation tough for me.


At the domestic relation meeting I asked for help with my situation and none was provided legally at any discounted rate. I make too much right now to qualify for help because I am stuck paying for this horrible debt. while working 12/16 hours shifts.

Concerning my daughter my bf told me that if I leave with my daughter that it is considered kidnapping and that I could be arrested. Do you know if there is any truth to that statement?


Thank you.

I suggest you will want to consult with a local real estate Attorney in your area then who can assist you with getting this done.

As to your daughter, first he has to be on the birth certificate to have any standing to do anything within the courts. And since there is no custody order, it is not kidnapping.

So, I suggest you will want to go to the court and file for a custody order. Get the permanent custody of your daughter. That way he can't take her either. Because without an order, the parent in possession is the parent in control and either can keep the child from the other. It is not kidnapping and the police will not get involved

My goal is to provide you with excellent service – if you feel you have received anything less, please reply back as I am happy to address follow-up questions. Kindly rate me when you are done.
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