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LegalKnowledge, Attorney
Category: Legal
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I live in the state of New York and am 18 years old I am being

Customer Question

I live in the state of New York and am 18 years old
I am being wrongfully accused of assaulting my 46 year old ex boyfriend (yes i know big age difference)

We had met on a dating site that may have had a disclaimer to be 18 years old when I was 15. The first day he picked me up he asked me if I was underage and I didnt give a clear answer. We then hung out a lot and I eventually ran away from home and lived with him and 2 addresses over the course of 2 years. There was physical and mental abuse going on and obviously sexual relations. I have personal videos of us, pictures of the 2 of us in both apartments. I received mail at one of the places after I turned 18. I also have birthday, valentines, etc cards with dates saying I love you when I was underage. I also have a video on my laptop when I was underage (no time stamp) of him saying "I will never ever touch you again sexually" and a whole bunch of other things to prove hes a physco abuser. I have old voicemails and texts. I also have witnesses I would have to hire a private investigator to go over to the old landlords houses so they can verify I lived there years ago.

Basically he called the police on my the other day for finding messages in my phone but who cares I found messages in his phone 2 weeks prior so I guess thatd make us even? NO he freaked out broke down and said he wanted to die demanded I show him my phone I can into my bathroom in MY apartment he chased me and I locked the door but he forced it open, then I ran out the bathroom into the main room (studio apartment) and he broke my camera and barricaded me in my own apartment which is recorded on his 911 call of him saying "IM BLOCKING THE DOOR SHOULD I LET HER GO. He kicked me in my leg while trying to escape so I scratched his face. I developed a palm sized bruise the next day. At the scene though police came saw he had scratches on his face and assumed I was the aggressor they also wouldn't let me into my own apartment they let my ex boyfriend in because he claimed there was a video camera in there that was his and he claimed he had a receipt for it..I have texts proving the video camera they allowed him to take was a GIFT and that I paid $79.95 for the accessories of that camera. He failed to show the police the busted bathroom door and broken $600 camera, and that he barricaded the door. They heard none of my story and allowed him to pretty much steal from my apartment. I was arrested and spent the night in jail which was NO FAIR AT ALL!!!@#$%

I need to bring up charges on him..He texted me saying he was dropping the charges but I know that doesn't mean they can still be brought up. He told the police we have trust issues and that he didnt touch me...When like I said the next day I developed a palm size bruise in jail. He has put my life through hell for the past 3 and a half years and its not right that he manipulated me. He told the police I lied about my age in the case I did even thought I'm 99% positive I Didnt will he not be charged with statuary rape? How can you know and live with someone for 3 and a half years and not know their age? HEs gotten tattoos of my name that I have pictures of and like I said I have a lot of stuff from the past to prove we were together..

Also would it be of my best interest to press charges for assault on him before or after my charges are dropped?

I have pictures of the busted door and camera, and Im pretty sure they have the 911 call of him admitting to barricading the door. Will they believe me although I took these pictures of the broken things when I got home the next day? I didn't even notice the door and had such an adrenaline rush and feared for my life during the whole situation.

I wanted to press the following charges:
statutory rape
trespassing (I told him to leave before things got physical)
assault for my bruise because I am the REAL victim
pain and suffering for his false accusations causing me to spend the night in jail
petty larceny for stealing the camera plus the things I bought for it
Breaking and entering and or criminal trespassing and vandalism for breaking open the locked bathroom door
and lastly something that relates to intrusion.

Do I have a case? If so which of these charges are worth placing on him?
Do I got to the precinct right now and file this ASAP? or so I wait? I have no idea what to do my free lawyer says do what I want paid lawyer from free consultation says dont talk to cops?
Will this assault that is placed on me run a separate case for the things I'd like to do or can this all come together?

I also have a receipt for my broken camera.

So while i was in jail waiting to see the judge my lawyer came to talk to me then she called him and said he doesn't want to proceed but guess where he is CALIFORNIA. wow.

If someone could please tell me EXACTLY how I should proceed with this????
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Legal
Expert:  LegalKnowledge replied 4 years ago.
Hi! I will be the professional that will be helping you today. I look forward to providing you with information to help solve your problem.

Good morning. I am sorry to hear about what you are going through and certainly understand the situation. This can be very tough and is scary to deal with. The most important thing right now is to make sure and do what you can, to have the charges dropped against you. This way, you will not have a criminal record. The crime of assault is against the State of New York, with him being the "victim". The State represents his legal interest and it is the State who decides if the case will proceed or not, assuming you fight this and take it to trial. That depends on his cooperation. If he fails to appear at trial and cooperate with them and remains in California, the State will not have a victim/witness to proceed and will likely drop the case. You stated above that you wanted to press charges against him for:

statutory rape
pain and suffering for his false accusations causing me to spend the night in jail
petty larceny for stealing the camera plus the things I bought for it
Breaking and entering and or criminal trespassing and vandalism for breaking open the locked bathroom door
and lastly something that relates to intrusion.

All of those are criminal offenses except the one for pain and suffering, which is civil and would require you to file a report and allow the police to investigate the matter. If there is enough evidence, the police could then proceed to arrest and charge him, turning over the case to the State, for prosecution. In the event that the State does not think there is enough to proceed, you would then need to file a civil lawsuit against him for the items taken which belong to you and the damage caused. If he was charged criminally, the State would try and obtain restitution for you, so you would not have to do this. Since a lot of these things stem from the alleged assault, the police may think that you are trying to retaliate against him and things which are said could be used against you in your case, which is why the attorney you spoke said to not speak with the police. The main advice which you need to rely on is that of your current attorney, since they need to act in your best interest. They know the case, have a plan of attack and will and should advise you about trying to file any new charges. The statutory rape charge is certainly the most serious and separate and apart from the incident that took place at your apartment. You need to remember that if you start trying to sue him and get charges filed, he may be more willing to cooperate at that time, to see that you are prosecuted. Of course, this should not matter if you have a legal defense and are going to fight this at trial but something to be aware of.

Please let me know if you have any follow up questions or need any clarification on something which I stated above, prior to rating me. Also, please remember to rate my service with 3, 4, or 5 faces/stars, before exiting the site, so I can receive credit for my help. I hope you found it to be Excellent! Only rate my answer when you are 100% satisfied. If you feel the need to click either of the two faces/stars on the left, please STOP and reply to me via the "REPLY TO EXPERT or CONTINUE CONVERSATION "button. I want to make sure your experience with the site was as pleasurable as possible and that you are satisfied with the help I provided.
Expert:  LegalKnowledge replied 4 years ago.
Hi Shay. I just wanted to follow up and see if you had any other questions or needed me to clarify something. I am here to help, so please let me know. Thanks!

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