How JustAnswer Works:
  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site. Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.
Ask Tina Your Own Question
Tina, Lawyer
Category: Legal
Satisfied Customers: 33167
Experience:  JD, BBA Over 25 years legal and business experience.
Type Your Legal Question Here...
Tina is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

husband moves in with mom nov.2010, has not spend any time

Customer Question

husband moves in with mom nov.2010, has not spend any time at home since-comes every other week or so to check mail box- and pick up retirement check,-left saying mom needs him, she did not want to stay in nursing home, he does not feel like working has retired, says he needs his money, so can't pay bills, did pay land taxes, has done nothing as far as work related-stop paying on land loan , we had purchased 2005, I finished paying off loan. he has missed 3 Christmas with his kids, calls them if he needs something they are married and do the farm work--says he will come home when something happens to mom but will sign the farm over to the kids so he won't have to work or pay any bills. At the time he left, he was able to get around, his doctor told him not to sit down or he would not be able to walk, he complains his legs hurts so he only makes necessary steps and sits the rest of the time. at present, he is almost to the place he can't do anything, but he left when he could do work but said he did not want to I do know where he is, he comes to get his mail on the days I work..Mon-wed-Fri. and his cell phone is still added to my bill, when I threatened to cut his cell phone off- he has left money for his phone since Dec. We do not file taxes together because he has not resided at the same address or purchased anything except paid land taxes and until this year, he took the tobacco buy-out check, paid the taxes and pocketed the remainder. This year I had the check put into a farm account. my neighbors will testify that he was able to work and get around when he left but has sit so long now he has problems. I do not want him back- I have struggled for over 2 years to keep the farm going-he don't want to come back as long as mom is alive- and the farm is in the kids name so he can keep his money and do no work---he has given a farm truck, an old truck to one son-nothing to his daughter-so that is causing a split in my kids--what are my options I did have a deed made for the house- he refuses to sign it over to me- the worst part, my parents passed away, my grandmother passed away, all my inheritance was put in the farm-the rest-we raised tobacco and paid for it-his mom is still alive and her money and house is put into his and one brothers name--since he lives with mom and the house is in his and his brother's name-if he goes to the nursing home-whose place will be held by the state--by the way-he is 73 years old--but i want this settled -so i need my optiosn, I don't want to spend the rest of my life taking care of someone who left when he didn't want to work and wanted to keep his money--he has bought a new lawn mower and refrigerator and all the groceries etc for mon--he does have money to spend when he wants to
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Legal
Expert:  Tina replied 4 years ago.

Hello and welcome.

I am sorry to hear of your difficult situation. Please note: (1) this is general information only, not legal advice; and (2) my function is to give you honest information and not necessarily to tell you what you wish to hear. There may be a delay between your follow ups and my replies as I review your responses and prepare your answer.

What information are you seeking? Are you wondering how your assets will be divided in a divorce proceeding? Have you been married just over 2 years or longer than that?

Customer: replied 4 years ago.

longer than that - about 40 years.


Expert:  Tina replied 4 years ago.
I see. What information are you seeking? Are you wondering how your assets will be divided in a divorce proceeding?
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

somewhat-he has his mom's house in his and his brother's name-since i put all my inheritance into the house i live in-can i give up on that house in exchange for the one i live in--if he has to go to the nursing home-will my house or his and mom's be tied up--he took the cd that was in both names-transferred to his only in another bank and his mom's address so i wouldn't know about it- i found out jan 2011 when he brought it to income tax app- have not filed since only spent $48.00 lin 2012 on farm supplies so i filed single-can i file a divorce on desertion--he left but i know where he is-he came by took his mail- threw the home ins and fuel bill for farm back to me-while i was on vacation July 2012-went through the house taking different things--I changed the lock on my door his mial is left in an outside box

Expert:  Tina replied 4 years ago.

Hello again, Peggy, and thank you for letting me know what information you are seeking from me.

Yes, TN law does recognize desertion as grounds for divorce, so you could seek a dissolution of the marriage on that basis since your spouse has essentially separated himself from you for more than a year. Under state law, willful or malicious desertion or absence of either party, without a reasonable cause, for one (1) whole year does provide a basis to seek a dissolution of the marriage.

Here is a link that sets out the grounds for divorce:

It may not be possible though to compel your husband to agree to an even exchange of the properties. Since the property he inherited is not in your name, it would typically be considered his separate property and you would not have an interest in it unless marital assets were used to improve it or pay a mortgage. If that is the case, then you might have some leverage to compel him to agree to grant you the home you live in.

If you do obtain a divorce, any property that you are awarded in the divorce would normally not be at risk for payment of his medical expenses if he must be placed in a nursing home. As long as you remain married, there is a risk that a lien could be placed against the property for payment of such expenses typically if he does not qualify for Medicaid or have other insurance to pay the expenses.

All property acquired during the marriage is normally subject to an equitable division, except assets acquired by one spouse by gift or inheritance, so most of the assets you purchased during the marriage would be subject to division in a divorce proceeding.

I hope this helps clarify the situation for you. Please remember to rate my service once you have all the information you need. If you have any other questions, please ask me – I’ll be happy to respond. Thank you!


Note: Please feel free to request me if you have future legal questions by going to your “My Questions” page and clicking on “Request Tina again” next to my photo. I look forward to hearing from you again.

Expert:  Tina replied 4 years ago.

Hello again,

I wanted to thank you for using JustAnswer, and to inquire whether my answer was helpful in clarifying your understanding of the law even though it may not have resulted in the outcome you were hoping it would.

Is there anything else I can assist you with?

If you do not require further legal information at this time, please feel free to bookmark my profile so you can request me when you do have another question. Here is a link to my profile:

Thank you very much and all the best to you.