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Robert, Attorney
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I think my husband is stalking me. How do I know for sure? If he is, what do I do about

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I think my husband is stalking me. How do I know for sure? If he is, what do I do about it? Can it be cured? Or does it just keep getting worse?
Hello and thank you for choosing JustAnswer!

In California, both criminal and civil laws address stalking. According to the criminal laws, a stalker is someone who willfully, maliciously and repeatedly follows or harasses another (victim) and who makes a credible threat with the intent to place the victim or victim's immediate family in fear for their safety. The victim does not have to prove that the stalker had the intent to carry out the threat. (California Penal Code 646.9,

The criminal penalty for stalking is imprisonment up to a year and/or a fine of up to $1,000. There are more severe penalties when the stalker pursues the same person in violation of a court restraining order, with a sentencing range of two to four years imprisonment. Persons convicted of felony stalking also face stricter penalties if they continue to stalk their victim(s). Courts may issue restraining orders to prohibit stalking. (California Family Code 6320)

A victim, family member or witness may request that the California Department of Corrections, county sheriff or the director of the local department of corrections notify them by phone or mail 15 days before a convicted stalker is released from jail or prison. The victim, family member or witness must keep these departments notified of their most current mailing address and telephone number. The information relating to persons who receive notice must be kept confidential and not released to the convicted stalker. (California Penal Code 646.92) The court may order a person convicted of felony stalking to register with local law enforcement officials within 14 days of moving to a city and/or county. (California Penal Code 646.9)

A victim of stalking may bring a civil lawsuit against the stalker and recover money damages. (See Civil Code 1708.7 for the elements and remedies of the tort of stalking.)

I suggest you fill out a restraining order and go from there. That might be all it takes. Your next steps (if that doesn't work) may consist of contacting local law enforcement and speaking with a local attorney.

The following links may also be useful to you:

National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, list of state-by-state resources for victims,

National Network to End Domestic Violence,

End Stalking in America,

Stalking Behavior, by D. T. Coon

Feel Safe Again (Sandy's Law, Massachusetts)

Los Angeles Co. District Attorney

Stalking Victims' Sanctuary, by Linden Gross

Association of Threat Assessment Professionals, (no endorsement implied)

I hope this has helped. Please let me know if you need me to further clarify my answer and I will do my best to further clarify.

Thank you and I wish you all the best!


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Customer: replied 5 years ago.

You answered my 1st 2 questions perfectly. Could you please also answer my last 2 questions? Thanks so very kindly. I truly appreciate your kind words.

Can it be cured? Or does it just keep getting worse?

Thank you for your follow-up.

If you are referring to Erotomania (also called de Clerambault's syndrome) then that is a medical condition for which I am not qualified to comment upon. That is a question for a Mental Health Expert (probably both a psychologist and psychiatrist).

Having said that the following links may be useful to you:


I hope this has helped. Please direct further medical mental health inquiries to a qualified Expert/Professional that can provide you with more. Pleas remember to click "Accept" so that I can be compensated for my work. Positive feedback is greatly appreciated.

Thank you and good luck!

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