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legaleagle, Lawyer (JD)
Category: Legal
Satisfied Customers: 13441
Experience:  Attorney-Business degree from The University of Texas
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I havent seen my son in three years. I got my

Customer Question

I haven't seen my son in three years. His mother and I split up when he was 8 months old because she became a different person after having our son and I fell inlove with another woman who is now my fiance. I use to visit my son until he was 14 months old but I was sick of my ex making me go to her parents house with her parents there to see my son. She wouldn't let me take him out for ice cream, she would even let my girlfriend meet him. I stopped seeing him thinking that she just needed time to get over me cheating on her but I was wrong. He is now 4 year old and she still will not let me see him she told me social workers don't approve of me seeing him because when I was 18 I got caught with 2 grams of weed. I got my life together, I have a wonderful caring fiance, a beautiful apartment and am going to school to get my education and take a trade un plumbing. I want to see my boy. Is there anything I can say to my ex to convince her to work out a deal outside of court (not sure if I can afford it at this time)or if we went to court would I have a chance at gaining visation rights? what would help me in court?
Submitted: 9 years ago.
Category: Legal
Customer: replied 9 years ago.
Relist: No answer yet.
Expert:  legaleagle replied 9 years ago.
It does not sound like she will come to an agreement with you but you could suggest family counseling with her and your son to gain her trust to reach a comfort level with you to agree to visitation. Otherwise court is your only option to compel her to allow visitation or partial custody. One conviction for a minor charge when you were young will not have a huge impact on your case. You goal in court is to provide testimony of credible witness and yourself that you are not a danger to your son and that is in the best interest of the child for you be in his life. Now be prepared for her to ask or for the court to order on its own that you pay child support.
Customer: replied 9 years ago.
She made an agreement with me... She wants me to pay her $81.50 per month, buy him three summer outfits and three school outfits, send him holiday gifts, and pay for his school supplies every year until he graduates.. She says she will let me know once a month as to how he is doing but I'm not allowed to see him until he's 14 and thats if he wants to see me. She said if I walked into his life right now it would tramatize him and it wouldn't be good for him. Do you think this is a good agreement? and is it better for him if I don't see him or is she just saying that to keep me away. What would the judge think? Thanks
Expert:  legaleagle replied 9 years ago.
I think if you want to be in his life the agreement does not get you what you want. I do not think a judge would find he would be tramatized just because the mother thinks so. I do not know you, your ex or your son so I can not tell you if it would be good or bad for you to be in his life. You could suggest to the judge you are willing to start visitation slow to get to know him and maybe help with any counseling he may need at first to get used to having a father around. But from my personal experience with my father and brothers it was harmful that my dad was not in their life when they needed a man around and today they still resent our father for leaving but he has passed now and they will never get a chance to resolve their emotional issues. So in my family it would have been better for our dad to be around than to have stayed out of our lives.