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Ask Ronan Your Own Question
Ronan, Solicitor
Category: Republic of Ireland Law
Satisfied Customers: 2253
Experience:  B. Corp Law, Ll.B. Dip Comm Prop. In general practice for more then 6 years
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Safety Order Against Mother of Child?My ex, the mother

Customer Question

Safety Order Against Mother of Child?

My ex, the mother of my child, is as vindictive as they come, she has broken court orders, spread rumours about me, including infidelity and drug abuse, lied about our child to acquire free items/money from both myself and others, verbally abuses me on a regular basis and physically threatens me every few weeks (although never physically hit me), she uses the child as a weapon in arguments she starts and as soon as she knows she has angered me enough to contact my solicitor then I have a letter in my hands from her solicitor with a twisted version of the argument before I can ever get into contact with mine. We have not lived together or been an item in over 5 years and this abuse has carried on through all that time. She has also tried to say the child suffers or has suffered from lactose intolerance, swine flu and autism (sadly the last one was taken seriously by the courts and I am still fighting it). Just an overview of what she has conjured in her head but I finally have had enough and would love a restraining order but sadly I know that is not possible.

What are my options to block this woman from my life, can I sue for defamation of character, lying in court or something similar?
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Republic of Ireland Law
Expert:  Ronan replied 4 years ago.
As a initial measure, you can seeking a safety order or a barring order against her. This will prevent her from behaving in an aggressive manner towards you or in a manner which puts you in fear of her. A barring order will bar her from the property where you reside.

Apart from this, there is little you can do as you have a child together.

If you feel she has defamed you, you can take proceedings in the civil courts against her from defamation. However from what you say she has little or no assets as such this even if you were successful, there would be no money there to pay you whatever you were awarded

In terms of lying in court, this would have to be proved. Perjury is a criminal offence and the case would have to be taken by the gardai/DPP as a criminal matter
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

Safety order might be the first step but I was under the impression we needed to be living together recently for this to occur?

Would request of a third party or public place be effective as a counter measurement?

On more than one occasion I have heard of rumours or told to my face by her about things that I am not involved in and are fabricated. I am not interested in any money, I just want it proven in court for future proceedings that she is the type of person who would do this so when we return to court, which is more than likely to happen, at least the judge will take what she says with a grain of salt.

How might this be proven? Surely she would says that she is not lying, can I request a lie detector or is that just in tv shows?

Expert:  Ronan replied 4 years ago.
No, if you have a child together you can seek a safety/barring order

I don t understand what you are asking in your second paragraphy

As for proving to the Judge that she is dishonest by bringing civil proceeding. This will have no bearing on the family law judge whatsoever even if it happens to be the same judge

In a defamation case, it is up to the defendant to prove what she has said is true. Rather then on you to show it is false. The burden of proof rests with her
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

"Would request of a third party or public place be effective as a counter measurement?"

I meant as in access, in choosing to meet in a public place when collecting my child or proposing someone else to collect/pick up the child so she does not come within any distance to me. Will a judge accept those alternatives?

You mentioned that her dishonesty would have no bearing on family law so does this mean, hypothetically, if someone was to be brought up on drug charges or worse one day in court and was fighting for access the next day then even if it was the same judge he could not put two and two together, he would have to deal with them as separate issues?

Finally, could I actually ask for a lie detector in an Irish court?

Expert:  Ronan replied 4 years ago.
Yes, judge would be agreeable to both

Yes, they are separate issues unless the adverse behaviour affects the welfare of the child. Saying things about you would not

Evidence of a lie detector test can be submitted to evidence but no one can be forced to take such a test nor are they conclusive
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
Relist: Other.
Just looking for a second/third opinion on the subject so I can make a better decision myself.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
Relist: Other.
want another opinion.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
Relist: Other.
want another opinion.
Expert:  Wendy-Mod replied 4 years ago.

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Customer: replied 4 years ago.

Yes, relist please.

Expert:  Wendy-Mod replied 4 years ago.

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