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911Doctor
911Doctor, Doctor
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Experience:  Board Certified Emergency Physician
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My boyfriend doesn't talk at all. other than in the morning

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my boyfriend doesn't talk at all. other than hello in the morning and goodnite at nite he doesn't speak. I haveto always start conversations with him and they end when I stop asking questions. his mother was the same way too, she never talked. when we go out to eat, I see others in conversations and we sit in silence. all day long he sits in he bedroom smoking cigarattes and watching tv. we don't even watch tv together. if I didn't insist on going out to eat or doing anything he would siit everyday in that bedroom watching tv. he doesn't work, has no interests no ambitions in life, and no opinions. I believe it has rubbed off on me. people perceive me as an introvert now, where in the past I was always one of the most talkative ones in the room. is this normal
911Doctor :

No, certainly not normal, and certainly, it seems, not optimal for you.

911Doctor :

This is often seen with long-married couples, but there seems to be an undercurrent of anger here, at least on your part

911Doctor :

and this is not healthy for a relationship

911Doctor :

as resentment will grow, and it seems as if you have a decent amount of this already

911Doctor :

I can only say that it seems to me that you may want to suggest couples counseling to your boyfriend

911Doctor :

If he agrees, great, you guys might make a breakthrough regarding communication and that would be the best outcome

911Doctor :

It is quite possible that he will refuse, and then YOU must decide if this relationship is worth keeping

911Doctor :

But I suspect you already knew this

911Doctor :

Relationships are hard, marriage is harder, and you need two willing participants in order to overcome the inevitable conflicts which will arise.

911Doctor :

So, time to do some work, time to try to get in with a counselor and see if you can make a breakthrough

911Doctor :

If not, time to take a hard look at this relationship, and a hard look at what you desire from a relationship, and from life.

911Doctor :

Your close friends are invaluable here, as they may really want to tell you how they feel about this, but may be scared to do so for fear of offending you.

911Doctor :

Close friends will likely validate your concerns, which will give you confidence to make the hard choices going foreward.

911Doctor :

I hope you can get this worked out, if not, I hope you can move on and get back to the person you wish to be.

911Doctor :

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