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sarahfnp-bc, Family Nurse Practitioner
Category: Health
Satisfied Customers: 408
Experience:  OB, L&D, ER, and family practice, addictions treatment and detox with methadone and suboxone.
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Im 24 weeks pregnent i realy need help i was goin to hava an

Customer Question

im 24 weeks pregnent i realy need help i was goin to hava an abortion i had so many problems that i kept missin dates.. then i had money issues n cudnt pay wen i got the money sorted i made a apointment n they sed i was ment to be 23weeks and 4days.. bt wen i was gna do it they sed they cnt nw because im 24 week... bt that isnt my fault because i was tld sumthin else on the fone from the day they checkd me.. bt nw i have a big issue i relly cant gv bith to this baby.. i realy love my parent and would neva do eny fing to hurt them i really need help and um soo scared.. i get ill thinkin all that..
Submitted: 8 years ago.
Category: Health
Expert:  sarahfnp-bc replied 8 years ago.

I'm sorry to hear what you are going through. I know it's a hard situation, but right now your baby is too developed to abort. You are at a point that is termed age of viability. What this means is your baby might be able to survive if born right now. It's not your fault, but it is where you are right now.

You should probably start thinking about other otions like adoption and pre-natal care. There are people worldwide looking to adopt healthy babies. So try to take care of you and your baby.

Here is some information:

If you have any other questions please let me know. I am sorry, about your situation but you can get through this.


Customer: replied 8 years ago.
bt go gv birth i have to stay over nyt and my parents are over protective... n i cn veva let n1 find out... n um realy scared ov givin birth i fort in life i wil adopt a baby bt not gv birth... is der nfin i cn do
Expert:  sarahfnp-bc replied 8 years ago.

No there is nothing you can do. You need to be honest with your parents, they're going to find out anyway, or move out. If you're close with your parents then you need to have an honest relationship.

As far as abortion goes it's too late. This baby can possibly survive if born right now. Meaning if you delivered today it has the ability to live. So there isn't a provider that would perform an abortion right now.

Customer: replied 8 years ago.
is ther any place that would let me give birth.. i can neva let eny1 find out.. my mum is ill.. an she will neva b able to take dat... n i wil neva want to hurt her
Expert:  sarahfnp-bc replied 8 years ago.
What do you mean a "place that would let you give birth?" Like a hospital or birthing center? Where do you live?
Customer: replied 8 years ago.
no i mean an early birth... im ova 24 wkz so is der eny chance ov early birth... im 4rm buckinhamshire
Expert:  sarahfnp-bc replied 8 years ago.

No, nobody would intentionally send you into labor right now. They could be charged with a crime for doing so. Although there is a chance the baby could live at this age there could lots of health issues for him or her if it happened now. The earliest most providers will induce a healthy pregnancy is about 36 weeks.

Get in touch with the adoption agencies. They will have plenty of help for you like counseling, food, pre-natal care, and they often can help with housing if your in a position where you really can't tell your parents.

Customer: replied 8 years ago.
my situatin is diffrent... the fing is if my ex finds out aswell then ez oredy made my life hell because of hm im in dis situation e used to even beat me up... but my mum jus fort it a randam guy dats callin for me.. she dont no the real truth.. even by him keep ringin my house fone got my mum rely ill.. n my mums an ill patiant.. n in eny way if my mum finds out i dnt knw wot gna hapen to her.. n dis situation i realy need help.. if i go to live sumwer else dat cnt b posible becase i live with my parents da most i can stay out is 1 night.. n me givin a full birth can nneva happen.. n if i go in labour then its gna cause so much problems... n v1z gna knw...
Expert:  sarahfnp-bc replied 8 years ago.

I feel for your situation and I have empathy for how difficult this is. You do not have a lot of legal options though right now. Have you been seen anywhere during this pregnancy? Has anybody provided you any prenatal care? How do you know that you are 24 weeks? You can try to make an appointment at an abortion clinic and have them date you. If they believe you are less than 24 weeks they may be willing to do it. If you tell them you cannot have this baby due to your mental health and situation they may be willing to do it. I think it's a long shot, but you can try.

Otherwise you need to look and explore other options, like adoption. If you have fear of your boyfriend then moving may be the best thing, as he won't be able to find you. Your mom will have to deal with what's happening or not. You need to do what's best for you. You are an adult who is about to have a baby. You need to get all the help you can get and take care of yourself. As an adult you can stay out of the house as long as you need. A loving relationship is about honest communication. You are keeping a lot of secrets from your mom. You need to give her the benefit of the doubt and tell her the truth or move out.

Medically your options are limited. This baby is coming no matter what you want. So the best thing to do is deal with it in a healthy adult like manner. It's hard but it can be done. I'm going to send you a link below on the abortion qualifications. So you can see what it would take to terminate at this time. It would be difficult but probably not impossible. You need to read through this and then go get seen right away.

Customer: replied 8 years ago.

iv decided to stay home wiv my parents wivout them knowin... n tryn make t for 36 week um bout 25wks nw n not really showin dat much.. last saturday i was 24wks and 2days... i was tld that at the abortion center... and my ex wud neva cum to my house knowin dat i do have a older brother.. but i was more scared b4.. nw from im um safe at ome.. n im not an out going person.. my family are going to change the house number so dats gud he cant call enymore...but is there any plc you wud knw that can help me n i wud b able to give birth without labour n early as posible?

Expert:  sarahfnp-bc replied 8 years ago.

I'm glad you have made a decision. I think it's going to be very difficult to hide this from your parents. In the last few months of pregnancy women grow quite a bit. So it may become really difficult to hide.

Here is a link to a hospital in your area that has maternity services.

Unfortunately babies come when they are ready not when you want them to. As long as you and the baby are healthy they may not delivery you until your due date. You can get pain medication but they won't cut the baby out unless there is a reason to do so. So you may have to go into labor. It's easier than surgery and the recovery time is less.

Here is a link to information on adoption in your area. You need to get in touch with these people as soon as possible. They can help you and answer all your questions on where to deliver, pre-natal care, post partum and more.