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I want to ask you about a strategy guide and timeline from…

For Expert Martin: Hello I want...
For Expert Martin:
Hello I want to ask you about a strategy guide and timeline from now till I visit his country and leave :) What can I do now step by step to keep building him up, influence his long term life plan and occupying his time/mind. Then once meet, how to push it to the next level.E.g. last time someone gives me advice to give him gifts at last minute as a surprise. Not only it gives me an excuse to meet him again, but also the thoughtful gift I hand picked for him has impacted his heart and I bet it will be hard for him to forget the moment that he received those special gifts. So this timed action has laid a great background for future progress. Of course your strategy of proposing another invitation after 15 mins so he will feel guilty to reject also worked :)
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Customer reply replied 6 months ago
You said he is rational and to get back together I have to tackle this, rather than using seduction alone. You might be right. This might explain why he only has short term flings, because he cut things off quickly for being very rational, whether it is over done or not.So what is the strategy and tactics to make him rationally think I am the ONE?
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12/23/2017
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Martin
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From time to time, let say 20 mins a day, try to reduce his amount of micro project he have in his mind.

Try to meet some of his friends there. If they like you they may act like agents for you when you are not there and put pressure on him to accept you again a as a gf.

Make him understand that you have physical sexual need, he might be able to understand that this can be see as separated than having a gf. From there he might get hooked the same way a man can be tricked by good home made food. He might now have fear to get close to you what he seem to fear is the responsabilies that come with having a gf. Make the responsabilies fly away.

Get him to show you places that may be nice to visit, take interest in what he have to say about them. Give him plenty of positive feedback on what he have to say. Everyone like to live around those that help elevate self esteem.

"So what is the strategy and tactics to make him rationally think I am the ONE?" First try to make him think that anyone would be good, because right now he have a monk mindset. You could start by asking him if he plan to get a roomate as this allow to free lot of money (all kind of hidden questions like that that will eventually make him realize that living in couple save tons of $ and rationally make sense)

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"So just ask: hey what are the things you want to do but haven’t?" Yes and no. men don't like to ask for help. Being there with him will allow to notice many of them. Only when you don't notice obvious one you can ask for some, or even a list.

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"Ps now we are chatting everyday. It is good to utilize this to build him up till I get to visit there"

Yes, that is good to keep the flame. But keep in mind that girl love Carly Rae Jepsen - Call Me Maybe while guys are more of the genre of Queen - Princes of The Universe. Communication is not as important for guys, they prefer actions with a clear defined start and end.

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Customer reply replied 6 months ago
here is what I mean by strategy:
Say you list a progress: eg
Dec 25-27: do/say bluh bluh (including lay a foundation to induce him about long term relationship value etc)
Dec 28-31: do/say bluh bluh
...
Jan 15: first meeting at a restaurant etc
Jan 16: second meeting at a bar and sit close
Jan 18: went on a trip and a club at night. Make it easy so maybe he can kiss me etc
...
Jan 20-22: go to his or my place etc
Jan 25: talk about our future and plans
..,
Jan 31: say goodbye and ask/tell him bluh bluhAlso combine strategy with tactics. Like often you told me what to do. But not how to do/say it. If you can give me the tactics that would be great. I am not saying it has to be strictly like the above, but at least I can see a progress of things and how to do it :) The main goals and tactics needed to be placed are:
1. Induce his long term perspective. Tackle his rationals and make them go away.
2. Get more and more flirty, seductive and take things to the next level. Upgrade to couples from friendship.From time to time, let say 20 mins a day, try to reduce his amount of micro project he have in his mind
- just ask him what he wants to do to find out?Try to meet some of his friends there. If they like you they may act like agents for you
- what can I do to make them like me? Talk about what they are interested?Make him understand that you have physical sexual need. responsabilies that come with having a gf. Make the responsabilies fly away.
- how to do these? What should I say to him?try to make him think that anyone would be good
-what should I say to him?Communication is not as important for guys, they prefer actions with a clear defined start and end.
- it is to get him occupied. The more time and energy he invests in me, the more he will think it is because he likes me and the less time he has to get bored and talk to others. It is very important to have him do things for me. To cost him energy, time, money etc. then no one wants to give up what they have put lots of effort into.
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
The main goals and tactics needed to be placed are:
1. Induce his long term perspective. Tackle his rationals and make them go away. Establish me as the one and only in his heart and mind.
2. Get more and more flirty, seductive and take things to the next level. Upgrade to couples from friendship.
3. Get him to invest in me, do all kinds of things for me. Get him to invest his time, energy or whatever.
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
try to make him think that anyone would be good
-what else should I say to him besides the roommate thing? Then next step what should I do/say to pop myself up to be the best one and only?"So just ask: hey what are the things you want to do but haven’t?
- once he told me, should I give my advice,opinion or simply support and encourage without advice?Remember the life biz plan you told me to find out why he is not ready? Once I find out some of the reasons, what should I do or say to make his rationals go away?And whatever you can think of that requires him investing his time, energy effort or money etc., let me know. Keep in mind even when he is talking to me, he is investing in me.

The strategy is hard to tell when i don't know the complete plan in advance. I am not near the event in real time like Cyrano de Bergerac hidden in a bush seeing all the scene and wispering what to say :)

As for tactics, you need to think like a guy. If you talk about long term perspective, play the independent (that might trigger some hunter instinct in him). Tell him what YOU plan to do. Many guys like to stick with someone (guy or girl) that know where they are going. Don't forget that you need to let him some freedom, so in your plan you need to let place for adventure and farniente (as say the Italians). You also need to let place for the right to make errors and try again.

To get more flirty, dont use the time after eating or too late in the evenning. Guys are
tired in those moments and like a break or even sleeping. After sports or a light physical activity he will be lot more responsive. Activity where you could be hurt may also bring protective instinct that would also make him more receptive.

"- just ask him what he wants to do to find out?"
I may have not named this right, call them "micro chore", they are things he don't do for many reasons. He will probably think you will not enjoy helping, but you can tell you would find it interesting if something you usually don't do or that you surely will learn something. It might look weird to dates with doing chore but believe me that is the best way to really know someone. You can show your tennacity and resourcefulness and those moment will be remembered more than futile fun things in the long runs. Just pick things that do not take more than 20 mins to 1 hour.

"- what can I do to make them like me? Talk about what they are interested?"
Exacly. You can also ask them for anecdotes and show great enjoyment at how they deliver them. Everyone like to be the center of attention for a few minutes.

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Customer reply replied 6 months ago
The strategy is hard to tell when i don't know the complete plan in advance.
- not exact but like an approximate. Just like a startup still need to estimate how much money they are going to make even they haven’t start making it yet.Also all the strategies and tactics are corresponding to the time frame of now till the day I leave his country, not in general and it should reflect a progress of getting back together
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
Make him understand that you have physical sexual need. responsabilies that come with having a gf. Make the responsabilies fly away.
- how to do these? What should I say to him?try to make him think that anyone would be good
-what should I say to him?try to make him think that anyone would be good
-what else should I say to him besides the roommate thing? Then next step what should I do/say to pop myself up to be the best one and only?"So just ask: hey what are the things you want to do but haven’t?
- once he told me, should I give my advice,opinion or simply support and encourage without advice?Remember the life biz plan you told me to find out why he is not ready? Once I find out some of the reasons, what should I do or say to make his rationals go away?
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
I am looking for something more specific to do from now on till I depart his country that I could maximize my goals:
Get back together
Get intimate
He wants a relationship and girlfriend
He sees me as very special and unique to him
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
Hmm...he sent me early Merry Christmas with snowflakes emoji. I laughed and said you finally find some snow without the snowman (I asked him to send snow photos from his country. He said there is no snow. I joked that he should make some. Then without taking any effort he made it through the emoji). I wished him and his family merry Christmas and ask him to send me his Christmas table photo.Then he didn't come to the chat tool or respond for long time and eventually told me he didn't take any photos but what food it is. I responded this morning and said ok it is similar to bluh bluh food. He didn't come to the chat tool at all (but he could still see the notification and the message itself without entering the app).What is going on? Is it because:
A. I offended him with my laughter, especially he tried to send early greeting.
B. He promised the christmas snow as a thanks for my gifts. Now he finished it, he wants to distance himself because he is done with his mission and he wants to move on (not completely not talking to me but like not everyday chat). Or he started going out? I doubt because he can't be going out on Christmas eve or the Christmas day.I doubt it is B but I want to go over it with you.
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
If it is A, what can I do to make it up?
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
Nvm. He was jet lagging and busy. He went out clubbing yesterday. Not sure if he hooked up with anyone or not.

Hehe, indeed, that was what i wanted to say, definitively not A :) I was also very busy with x-mas things lately and was not even able to find one minute to log to the internet. You will have to be really creative to offend a guy. As long as you don't mock him physically or one of his skill he is proud of, men are impervious to mocking.

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Customer reply replied 6 months ago
Hope you had a great Christmas!I guess maybe he wants to be more detached, he probably wants to start seeing women. Or maybe because he sensed I want to be more close. Or maybe because I postedhis photo saying he is a slayer of evils (the whore).What about my other questions?
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
He said he was busy. Well we all know busy is an excuse :)Ps I read yesterday that attraction will make emotion go higher while logic go lower. So the attraction approach does work even the logic is still not valid. Because his emotion will convince him other logics. So It is not necessary to simply focus on tackling the logic/rational. I remember he gets more rational when we started having issues while nothing was a problem when things are going well or emotions are high. So focus on attraction and seduction will probably make the rationals go away or at least go lower.
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
Which do you think is the most likely reason?:
A. He wants to be more detached, he probably wants to start seeing women
B. He sensed I want to be more close
C.Because I posted his photo on my social media saying he slays evils (the whore) for the whore to see
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
now how often should I talk to him? Should I try to avoid him a little bit (since he might be looking for hookups and it is embarrassing for both of us)), or try to stay in touch to reduce his chance of doing that?
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
Should I tell him that I have lined up guys to meet in his country to create a sense of urgency and desirability? If so how do I say it?Also since he is content with being single/ monk or not needing anyone, how to disrupt his false sense of harmony and create that dissatisfaction that he is better off with me?

Sorry for the delay, the site was down each time i wanted to log lately.

"attraction will make emotion go higher while logic go lower"
Yes, but this is not always the case. Someone very logical naturally may even not "suffer" that effect.

Not C, As for B he surely know that from the start. I don't think he want to start to see other women for a while.

It is always good to avoid him a bit, you need to let ANY guys some time off. As for reducing the chance, nothing you can do will reduce those chances, they exist and that is all.

"lined up guys to meet" that is weirdly worded :) The "in his country" is also not 100% convincing, why not include some of them where you are currently. You need to say that you can't wait for him forever, some just back off totally when they face competition (i don't know of competitive he is).

How to make him go out of his monk state? That is hard to tell, nobody know how to get someone out of depression and monking is just as strong. He need to have accelerated experiences in his life to be able to evolve faster.

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Customer reply replied 6 months ago
Someone very logical naturally may even not "suffer" that effect.some just back off totally when they face competition (i don't know of competitive he is).
- As you said, he is so logic, that he won't be affected by emotion, or competition. And honestly part of his logic, is related to his avoidance and narc mentality traits.get someone out of depression
- Have you read the book The Art of Seduction? It says in order to seduce, you have to create dissatisfaction and the person has to feel depressed. So depression is fine except he needs another kind of depression: unhappy about being alone and not having anyone by the side. So I have to figure out how to create that needs and dissatisfaction.I don't think he want to start to see other women for a while. As for reducing the chance, nothing you can do will reduce those chances, they exist and that is all.
- I think he is ready to start seeing. Ever since I caught him with a woman in Oct, he has been pretty quiet and hardly dated. Now he has moved back, I am out of sight and less occupied in his mind, so he is ready to go out. Although he is aware I will be there in January. Thoughts? And of course I am able to reduce that chance by just occupying his time and mind.Make him understand that you have physical sexual need. responsabilies that come with having a gf. Make the responsabilies fly away.
- how to do these? What should I say to him?try to make him think that anyone would be good
-what else should I say to him besides the roommate thing? Then next step what should I do/say to pop myself up to be the best one and only?"So just ask: hey what are the things you want to do but haven’t?
- once he told me, should I give my advice, opinion or simply support and encourage without advice? Or you want me to fulfill/do it together with him?Remember the life biz plan you told me to find out why he is not ready? Once I find out some of the reasons, what should I do or say to make his rationals go away?
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
He need to have accelerated experiences in his life to be able to evolve faster.
- How can I help it a little bit in here?
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
You need to say that you can't wait for him forever
- I really can’t say anything directly. We are supposed to be just friends so there is no such thing as I can’t wait. He told me not to wait :) I need to hint him that I am going to see guys in his country but just need to say it artfully that arouse his competition without making him feel like a setup. What do you suggest?

"So I have to figure out how to create that needs and dissatisfaction. "
That is why i mentioned to you that you need to make him understand than living as a couple is economically more advantegous. You make more money in the end OR you can decide to work less.

"Make the responsabilies fly away."
Give him situation where a gf would usually get upset, but you don't. Be libertarian as much as you can.

"the best one and only"
We can never be sure about that. There is too many person in the world to have a certitude about that. One just have to settle with good enough after a certain time. The search for perfection is the best way to stay alone all his life.

" Or you want me to fulfill/do it together with him?"
Yes, do it with him, do it for him, anything that will remove the chors/task from his mind.

"what should I do or say to make his rationals go away?"
Show him the total at the bottoms of the rows that compare in saved time and money and hapyness and opportinity how being with you (scenario 1) is better than (scenario 2) being alone. If you have time graph with that it is even more convincing.

"How can I help it a little bit in here"
Help him to get a job with more challenge. Let him break his neck on some project you know in advance will be failure.

"What do you suggest?"
Imply that some of them are a bit of bad boys, perhaps he will step in to protect you.

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Customer reply replied 6 months ago
Hehe lol :)))I feel like after my overloaded Christmas greetings back, he has been taking a step back and not getting online much, but he is still very nice and responding if I reach out.How do I break this curse? Does this also mean I shouldn’t take the initiative to wish him happy new year unless he does it first? Just to withdraw a bit. Or I would look not so nice this way?
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
I bet if I really don’t talk to him or move on, he won’t like it either. How to put a final throttle on this forever push and pull game and make him finally make a move to give in and reconcile?
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
I know the life business plan and making him realize why two is better than one are great ideas. What other ways you can think of?

It is really hard to make instinct kick in in an urban area. If you too would be stranded on an island or a rally in the desert, he would be urged to protect you and in hard situation he would really need you because colaboration would be a survival deal. Starting a farm could start those same habits.

In a town, someone decided to be like a monk have it easy, security, food, all kind of convenience, there is no real need for others. Socializing can be done with computer.

Being with him sure increase the chance. If you can participate in his hobby, at least two (not more because being all the time together can lead to fight, anyone need time alone). It might be video games, sports, arts, drawing/pinting, dance, travelling etc... The same way you can pull him into one of your hobby. In the end you have to have things in common to do.

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Customer reply replied 6 months ago
I m sure he still feels sour that I commented on his look. On the day I gave him the gifts, he said a girl (me) said he is ugly. Then he said he is just joking. How can I help dissipate his this feeling?

Don't worry about that, it won't stop him to sleep at night. Don't dare to say that his new car (if he ever buy one) is ugly that said :)

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Customer reply replied 6 months ago
Unfortunately he is the kind of guy who is not interested in cars :)Do you think it is more because he realized I want relationship or more because he is picking up girls that he has pulled back?
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
Yet he minded the most about his look. That is why it is very important to fix this. Any way?I shouldn’t take the initiative to wish him happy new year unless he does it first? Just to withdraw a bit. Or I would look not so nice this way?How to put a final throttle on this forever push and pull game and make him finally make a move to give in and reconcile?

wishing happy new year is out of any strategy and can be done without anybody thinking you have any other intention behind it.

When you mention he does not like car, that he seem to care about his look, i wonder if he might not by any chance be gay. The kind of gay that is not 100% clear. That could explain a lot of other things.

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Customer reply replied 6 months ago
Even that he dates lots of women? Does he know he is gay? I doubt he has ever slept with guys, at least his body doesn’t look so
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
The kind of gay that is not 100% clear
- Like?Why he pulled back recently? More because he is picking up on girls or because he realized I still want him?
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
He has once said because he doesn’t date much, his mom has thought he is gay.Should I ask him?
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
I asked a straight guy, he doesn't like car either (just a transportation tool). So I don't think that means anything if he doesn't like cars or he pays attention to his look. I think he just has the avoidant attachment style and a little bit narcissist.
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
But seriously, he is cautious right now, are you sure it wouldn’t matter if I wish him happy new year or not? If I wish he knows I m interested and he would still avoid me. If I don’t I look rude. What to do?!
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
Ps how can I solve the problem now he is avoiding because he probably realized I am still interested?
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
Well I sent the life business plan idea to him for a new year reflection. I bet he is partially pissed...because I basically also said how his 2017 wasn’t that gelreat as he thought as he would by leaving me...
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
his 2017 wasn’t that great as he thought he would by leaving me...*
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
Also he still never stand up for me for what the whore has done to me and us. What can I do to make him behave like a real man: fight and protect me?

He definitively will not find weird any New Year wish. That said the longer you do it after january 1rst, the more weird it will get.

Narcissist is pretty much being gay with himself. He may not like car, but most guy will at least be interested about some technical aspect of it and if they have another prefered transportation method, then they will be very interested int he technical aspect of it. Guy are like that, they like the technical (or at least the performance specification if they are not very wise) of almost anything.

You usually can have a good idea of gayness by asking him what was in is opinion the best technical invention of 2017. Note that many gay (and women) are very technical minded, the the lack of it "can" mean they lean a lot on that side. A narcissist will more often be with a woman as a trophy wife than other reasons.

"What can I do to make him behave like a real man: fight and protect me?" Don't overestimate that guy quality, their is very few that do this. A lot of guys are coward.

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Customer reply replied 6 months ago
He talks about technical stuff. He almost wanted to be a startup investor, but I don't think he has enough knowledge of it. And then he talked about bitcoin.Narcissist is pretty much being gay with himself
- So you are saying he is not a direct gay who likes men, but he has no real interest in women?
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
After I sent the life biz plan, I also got grumpy and sent them a message saying he left one thing at my place, which is the misplaced feeling (those caused by the whore but he blames me on instead). I told him to take it all away from me and place it onto the right host (the whore). He then called me three times now and I haven't called him back.I will be in his country in one to two weeks. What should I do in these time: try to distant to make him feel like he is losing me? Or try to keep the conversation going and make it get warmer and warmer?I heard jealousy is a powerful tool to make a guy want a girl back. Should I play it? How (besides telling him there is someone interesting)? I heard one guy says his ex send him a photo of her in bed with another man, he got panic and started thinking about how to get her back.

"but he has no real interest in women?" I would say probably more interest in himself.

"He talks about technical stuff" i must point that this is not he same as doing technical stuff. (by the way bitcoin is a bad idea on many level, if you want to learn more about them, read the latest ars techica article on them https://arstechnica.com/tech-policy/2017/12/how-bitcoin-works/

keep the conversation going and watch how it impact him before going further. Proximity will make thing different than with phone and texting.

"Should I play it" narcissist don't like to loose things they once got, unless it is to upgrade to a better model.

"happy new year" is a very casual thing, i don't use it as a pick up line you know :)

If he see you are interested, you just hint that it is still a future possibility, that you keep all your option open like every wise person do (slighly telling at the same time that only fool do not change their mind).

Putting back the whore on the table was not a good idea. It's turning the knife in the wound, past is past and need to be accepted to move on. Especially with a narcissist.

"I heard one guy says his ex send him a photo of her in bed with another man, he got panic and started thinking about how to get her back." That is a strategy like any other, as long as it not made to look like some kind of vengeance or threat.

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Customer reply replied 6 months ago
keep the conversation going and watch how it impact him before going further
- what do you mean? Are you saying he knows he is gay or he doesn’t? Honestly not all is interested in tech. Biz man, doctors, lawyers don’t.If I go to his country and he still don’t make any moves, what should I do? Take initiative?Why you keep saying he is narcissist?
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
Many people are more interested in themselves. I don’t think this says much. I m probably too.
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
I really think he is just afraid of intimacy, avoidance attachment style or narcissistic traits can both cause this.
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
Do you still think he is a womanizer?

"he knows he is gay or he doesn’t" he doesn’t. Those that know it notice their attirance for other men. When you have an attirance for yourself, you don't notice it, the same way touching your own ribs do not cause tickle.

"Biz man, doctors, lawyers don’t"
Are you noticing you are naming the professions with the most narcissist ratio of all :P

I don't say he feel noting for women, this whole things in a ratio and he might have a very little ratio for women.

"what should I do? Take initiative". Depend of the time you are willing to spend on the project (him beingthe project). If you can wait, time will do a lot of the work, if you are in a hurry, take the initiative at around 80% into the allowed time for that trip.

"narcissist" because you said so that he have those trait, that i see the same thing from how you describe him to me. He is not a sociopath, those are different thing. That is why he wish you good, he just seem to enjoy himself more alone than with others.

"I m probably too", yes, another thing that is not a clean cut and is a ratio.

"Do you still think he is a womanizer?" no. You need a car for that :P

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Customer reply replied 6 months ago
Are you saying he doesn’t know he could be more interested in men than women, or you are saying he is more interested in himself than anyone else? Yes you are right he likes to be alone and don’t think he needs anyone.What can I do to induce him so he will be able to have long term relationship?
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
Should I make him reflect on thinking about if he is gay? But he is probably just a narc who behave like this, rather than a gay
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
He is not interested in friends that much as well. Trying to be as less maintenance as possible. Honestly I like to be alone as well and prefer meaningful social than just hanging out. I think he is even doing better than me. So I don’t see anything wrong about it.
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
I just heard from a real life example that in order to induce someone to change, you want to figure out what he wants and then give him that.
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
I feel a bit despair...he seems quite impenetrable

I feel that you two would be quite happy on a small recluse organic farm. If you can get him to decide to live recluse in a remote area, his minimum social interaction will have to be with you and it may end up blue lagoon style.

He may like the idea of being his own boss with his own task schedule. Also having the security of producing food in advance on contract is a good way to remove monetary stress and drama associated with larger farm (employee, yield etc...).

A narc will like to show off, a naturally recluse will be very happy if nobody witness his bro***** ***** jump world record.

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I feel that you two would be quite happy on a small recluse organic farm. If you can get him to decide to live recluse in a remote area, his minimum social interaction will have to be with you and it may end up blue lagoon style.

He may like the idea of being his own boss with his own task schedule. Also having the security of producing food in advance on contract is a good way to remove monetary stress and drama associated with larger farm (employee, yield etc...).

A narc will like to show off, a naturally recluse will be very happy if nobody witness his bro***** ***** jump world record.

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Customer reply replied 6 months ago
Lol I think he likes the city. Ps after I send him the biz plan and the grumpy message that he should blame everything onto the whore, he thought I hate him again and I explained I am just tired. Now he is totally avoiding going online again lol. Afraid of drama maybe
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
What should I do now since I fear our friendship might be broken again as he knows clearly the friendship is just an excuse?

Yes, that was a bad move, i told you to not dig the past.

You need to do as if nothing happend about him being suddently mad again.

It will take 3 time as long for him to come back to a talkable state than it did last time. And if you do it again, be sure to not be able to see him before 15 years.

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Customer reply replied 6 months ago
why I can’t just point it out clearly that it is the whore he should blame all his hurt on than me? If I don’t do this, he might always see me as the one who has hurt him and might not forgive anyway forever. He said he will forgive but never forget.Wouldn’t you think while he wouldn’t like that I point out he blamed the wrong person, but it will lead him to start having the right mind set of placing the right blame? It is like short pain vs long pain. This is short pain. Let him blame me is like long pain.He will still talk to me. But of course he didn’t like the blame.
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
He was already on alert and avoiding me because he figured I want more, which caused me to get grumpy and send the message. Why can’t I just make it straight that he is just a dice on the chess played by the manipulator rather than me? I am helping him to gain the right mind set that I am never his hurter or enemy. He can only create a win win situation by working with me rather than working again just me.
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
He saw me as the problem and think breaking up with me will free himself. But that is a win situation only for himself, not win win. Which is why it didn’t really solve the problem because I haunted after him till this day for the grudge. I think I should make him understand the real win for both of us is we stand together fight against the outsider rather than he keep distance against me
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
he is the one who is not nice first by avoiding me. The only difference is he is passive aggressive, I am direct.
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
What do you think?
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
Can you let me know?

He may mix cause and culprit. You may have been a cause by doing drama (according to him) that pushed him to that whore but by not doing it with intent you can hardly be blamed. He might also need a scapegoat to blame to avoid blaming himself because he can't take critic, especially not when it come from himself. After all he was always 100% conscious for the whole thing.

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If a scapegoat need to be, i would say it was a lack of communication between you two at the start of the relationship on what make you tick and what make you blow a fuse. Always read the technical specification before buying somethings.

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Customer reply replied 6 months ago
Ps. When you say he accepted the whore offer and he is 100% conscious on everything, you mean he really wanted the whore; or he just wanted the attention and he really just see the whore as a friend?Thanks!
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
see the whore as a friend as he always says *

Note that i say whore on your own term, i have no proof (video or anything) of them doing anything wrong. It is very rare a guy go see another women for attention. He may also never did saw the seduction she made on him and genuinely see her just like a friend.

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Customer reply replied 6 months ago
He didn’t see her. They flirted online. Narcissist do need ego pump for attention:)Ps I opened a new question for you. Could you help?:
https://my-secure.justanswer.com/question/index/ff9d6d587fbc4fa292dff7273e205ee6?al=1&utm_source=sys&utm_medium=email&utm_content=viewmessage_bu&utm_campaign=mod_ir&r=nte%7C2018-01-15_pdcJaUsTrxModCheckIn%7Cln=viewmessage_bu&rpt=1020
Customer reply replied 6 months ago
I hope you could help ����. You have been quite sharp on a lot of judgement and understanding of men
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