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Cher, Educator-40+ yrs
Category: General
Satisfied Customers: 21417
Experience:  M.A., B.A., Author, Information & Research Specialist
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My parents are divorced and both have remarried. I legally

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(edit Mod: Parent has been verified and question is okay to answer) My parents are divorced and both have remarried. I legally have my dad's last name. My mom's is different. I have talk to my mom and she said it was ok to hypinate my name with her new married name and my last name as long as my dad's last name was last out of respect for him. I'd like to have both my mom's last name and my dad's last name. I don't like it when people don't think my mom is my mom because of her name. My dad is completely against it!! My mom said that we can't do anything legal until I'm 18 but I'd like to start writing it this new way and be know as such. What do I do to make my dad understand? He can't stop me from writing it, but he does yell at me. I don't understand? Thank you for listening!!!
Submitted: 7 years ago.
Category: General
Expert:  Cher replied 7 years ago.

Explain to your dad that you mean him no disrespect, but it is uncomfortable for you to be asked why your name is XXXXX XXXXX your mom's, in school matters, etc., and it's definitely NOT a legal change, because you are underage, but for the time being, it will just make things easier for you to include your mom's name, hyphenated with your dad's name, until you are older and it doesn't matter as much, that you have a different last name from your mom.

Your dad's feelings are hurt because he feels that you are 'taking' the name of your mom's new husband, and you only have one dad--him!

If you explain to him that you will always be "Your First Name + Your Dad's Last Name", and you're glad you have his name and glad to be his child, but this will just make things easier for you for NOW, it's not permanent at all, and hopefully, he'll understand. Otherwise, don't bring it up again, and write your name the way you like, on school papers and such.

I wish you much good luck!


Edited by Cher on 12/16/2009 at 3:37 AM EST
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