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My wife issued a restraining order against me that will last…

My wife issued a restraining...
My wife issued a restraining order against me that will last one week. She will be home with the kids while I'm at a hotel.
What should I do in the meanwhile?
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Answered in 1 minute by:
3/23/2018
Sean K
Sean K, Family Law Attorney
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 866
Experience: Family Law Attorney in Private Law Firm
Verified

Hi, I’m Sean and I will be assisting you as an expert today. I’m an attorney with more than 20 years of experience. It is my goal to provide a solid overview of your situation. Whether the analysis is good or bad as to your matter, I want to make sure you understand any points you need and that you have options to better address the questions you have. If I am able, I will also provide you with some resources. Please note that the system, independent from me, may offer a phone call. You are not obligated to engage in a phone call, but I am happy to speak if you desire. This is completely up to you.

I am sorry to hear that this is occurring for you. Let me ask if you have been to Court on the restraining order as of yet?

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Customer reply replied 3 months ago
I was just handed the restraining order last night by an officer, and barely left the house this morning.
I have a question about the phone call you mentioned- does it add a cost to this service?
Thanks

Certainly - the phone calls are an extra charge in addition to the answers and dialogue here. You certainly are not in any obligated nor will I even suggest a call, but I like to point it out as the system will often offer one automatically.

So back to the restraining order - if it is just for a week, it is a temporary restraining order. Is there mention of a Court date?

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Customer reply replied 3 months ago
it just says which date and time it expires
Customer reply replied 3 months ago
one of my concerns is that if I just let the week pass without doing anything, if anything else goes south in our marriage, my lack of action today would somehow put me in a disadvantage if things go to court.
the main issue if we get a divorce is to have split custody on the kids

So those in cases usually the application made to the Court is that there is an immediate need for a restraint. If the application makes this allegation, the Court will issue a Temporary Restraining Order that lasts up to 15 days, or in your case, 7 days. Likely there will be another hearing set in the future, perhaps in the three week time frame that you would be given notice of and a Court would decide if the Temporary Restraint was properly issued. (Sometimes people get restraining orders with no good reason or to have some advantage in a case). If a follow up restraining order was issued at a later hearing, then that would continue further.

So what can you do? Stand by and I will set out some strategies.

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First, carefully review the terms of the restraining order as to what you can and cannot do. If is a complete restraint on contact with your wife and children as they sometimes are? Or is it a restraint on in person and not electronic? Is it just to stay away from the home or perhaps limited to times of day? Determine the parameters and follow them to the letter. Do not stray at all. If that happens, at later hearings, or in a divorce action, that can come back to haunt you and there really is no explaining violations away.

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Next, start to keep a log during the week of anytime your wife calls you or lets the children call you. If she is going to do this (and people do) this goes a long way towards showing that she may not really need a restraining order. I would have no way of knowing this for sure, but sometimes people go see attorneys and they tell them to pursue the restraining order route to get an edge when one is really not needed.

If she calls or allows the children to, note it.

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Customer reply replied 3 months ago
i believe its a full restrain, and I have no intentions to violate it.
Should I attach a copy for you to see?
May I ask where are you located?

i am on the east coast and I am happy to review it.

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Next, you want to pay attention to your assets such as bank accounts and retirement accounts, any others as well, credit cards included to make sure that you keep a careful eye on balances so money does not start to disappear without you knowing about it.

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Customer reply replied 3 months ago
ok I can attach it shortly. Its confidential right? you are obligated not share it with anyone right?

Everything stays on here with no disclosure - that is correct. I cannot and would not share it with anyone. Correct.

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I would also strongly recommend you going to see a divorce attorney in the county where the restraining order was filed. This will give you a better understanding of your rights and they can expand on the ideas that I have given you here. It may also be possible for them in the next week to begin to do ground work on any other issues related to this. You could also have them verify if there has been or to keep an eye out if there was a divorce filing.

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Customer reply replied 3 months ago
see file

Give me a moment and I will look at this.

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It may be possible you have another date, but at this point, on that date, it expires.

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A final point to continue the ideas above.

Finally, I would say that after the restraining order is lifted on the day noted in the order, reach out to your wife prior to just showing up. Offer to meet at a neutral location and talk. Many people don't do this and I believe it is a missed opportunity to show them that you are willing to address things.

However, since you have used the week to do preparation if she won't talk or if the talk goes bad, you can protect yourself.

Please note: This is general information for educational purposes only and is not legal advice. There is no specific course of action is proposed and no attorney-client relationship or privilege formed within this conversation.

If you have any follow up questions it would be my pleasure to answer them. As experts we only get credit for the time and effort we spend on our answers if you rate us positively - 5 stars is definitely appreciated but not required! There is no cost associated with you rating me and you can still ask follow up questions after rating me and I will respond.

One final point, there may be a delay between your question and my answer; this is because I'm either not at my computer or helping someone else but rest assured, if you ask, I will provide an answer. Thank you again.

Sean K
Sean K, Family Law Attorney
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 866
Experience: Family Law Attorney in Private Law Firm
Verified
Sean K and 87 other Family Law Specialists are ready to help you
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Customer reply replied 3 months ago
the truth is I believe my wife and I are going to try to work it out but I just dont want a week to pass and if it turns out she will have any attempt to keep the kids away from me I want to know I did prepare necessary steps

Please let me know if there is anything else I can help you with. And thank you!

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DISCLAIMER: Answers from Experts on JustAnswer are not substitutes for the advice of an attorney. JustAnswer is a public forum and questions and responses are not private or confidential or protected by the attorney-client privilege. The Expert above is not your attorney, and the response above is not legal advice. You should not read this response to propose specific action or address specific circumstances, but only to give you a sense of general principles of law that might affect the situation you describe. Application of these general principles to particular circumstances must be done by a lawyer who has spoken with you in confidence, learned all relevant information, and explored various options. Before acting on these general principles, you should hire a lawyer licensed to practice law in the jurisdiction to which your question pertains.

The responses above are from individual Experts, not JustAnswer. The site and services are provided “as is”. To view the verified credential of an Expert, click on the “Verified” symbol in the Expert’s profile. This site is not for emergency questions which should be directed immediately by telephone or in-person to qualified professionals. Please carefully read the Terms of Service (last updated February 8, 2012).

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