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1. As to the photos, the ownership of those photos belong to the person who took the photograph and so long as the person is not using the photo for a commercial purpose, they typically do not need your consent.
2. As far as a court order, it would be termed "an injunction" by which the court could allow you access to the funeral accompanied with a sheriff and/or order a return of any photographs that belong to you.
3. If your state law permits, then use of your likeness can be precluded by such an injunction; including use of your photographs without your permission.
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