TN is not a community property state. That means that the property will be divided up equitably or fairly. That doesn't necessarily mean equally.
A lot of spouses start moving money around after they start thinking about divorce. You need to get an attorney as soon as possible to make a motion to stop anyone from touching anything, although if she hasn't filed yet, then you may need to file for divorce first and make the motion at the same time. You should not be using the same lawyer. That is not a good situation and it's not ethical in many instances. A lawyer cannot represent both of you, so one of you will be out in the cold.
You each need your own lawyer.
She will likely have to account for anything she took in your equitable distribution state. So if a judge divides up property 55% 45% she may be held accountable for what she already took and that amount of the 401K could be charged against what the judge would give. For example, if the judge allows her to get $100,000, and the 401K is $50,000, that $50,00o could be deducted from her overall award from the judge.
Many times the other spouse DOES make it disappear before the court date. You need to get your own attorney and have papers started immediately so that she can't dissipate or raid any other money, including this one. If his a joint 401K? Sounds like it as it's after the marriage. That is part of the marital assets, so that could be deducted from her overall share. YOu need an attorney to move on this asap. You shouldn't wait till next Weds to see a lawyer. I can help you find lawyers in your area if you'd like, just need the nearest big city or town and I can find family lawyers for you.
At this point, she is showing she cannot be trusted to maintain the status quo and that is what judges want. The status quo -- to preserve it.
Please consider getting your own attorney asap and getting him/her to draw up papers immediately and a motion getting her to stop taking property.
I would be concerned yes. She can do what is call"wasting" the property and leaving nothing left to distribute!
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