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Samuel II
Samuel II, Attorney at Law
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 27011
Experience:  General practice of law with emphasis in family law.
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We are in the process of divorce. We only filed the petition

Customer Question

We are in the process of divorce. We only filed the petition in court 2 weeks ago. Our 2.5 y.o. child was diagnosed with autism, and I have to stay home so that I can take him to therapy a few times per week.
My ex-husband wanted to pay for my mom to come visit us for 3 months and help to watch our son so that I can get a part-time job.
Now he is is trying to "negotiate with me" and asking me to sign a document where I promise to get a job during that term
(so that he can pay me less alimony) and that I would agree to 50/50 custody. Originally I was planning to get 70/30 custody. I feel that he is blackmailing me.
We have a history of domestic violence which was dismissed because I didn't pursue it, and also he went to rehab for drug abuse.
He also threatens me that he would turn off cable and Internet in our apartment if I won't agree to 50/50 custody. Is it legal to ask me to sign a paper in exchange for my mom's visit? Thank you!
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Samuel II replied 1 year ago.


This is Samuel and I will discuss this and provide you information in this regard.

There is nothing illegal and this is not blackmail. It is a negoiation process. And if he has not been court ordered to pay for your Mom to come to you and assist, then he is under no legal obligation to do so.

And unfortunately cable and internet are not necessities and unless he has been court-ordered to keep paying for those he is under no legal obligation to do so. However, when you go to court, you can make a request that he continue to pay for those for you or that the cost be included in your alimony because it is part of the lifestyle that you have become accustomed to living.

As to being pushed by him to find employment, a court may agree that you will need to find employment. Alimony/spousal support has a few nuances. And you can read about that here at this LINK in the California Code.