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Gerald-Esquire, Lawyer
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 3991
Experience:  30 years of experience
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I have been divorced years. Ex lives in another state. We

Customer Question

I have been divorced for 4 years. Ex lives in another state. We have joint legal custody but I have primary physical. Our minor children have been seeing the same therapist for 3 years. The children experience a great deal of anxiety when visiting with my ex. Ex would only attend one therapy session with boys but stopped because they should have been "cured". Upon my request of to lessen visitation until the anxiety is better, ex requests instead to have "family therapy" in the other state. We (my attorney and I ) agreed to ex seeking family therapy so long as we were informed of the therapist and that the therapist consults with the boy's current counselor. That was six months ago. Ex attended therapy with the boys without informing me. Finally after a month of this, I was able to get the name of the therapist. I called the therapist and explained that we had joint legal custody and I want to be informed of all appointments and wanted all records. Therapist (psychologist) told me that he was not a "family therapist" but rather a personal therapist to my ex. He only had the boys attend the sessions to "aid" in my ex's treatment. Through discovery answers submitted by ex under oath, ex states that therapist is indeed a "family therapist".
In July, my attorney sent the therapist a letter explaining the joint custody status as well as the fact that I did not consent to treatment unless I knew of and could attend appointments and that he consult with the boy's counselor. My attorney also sent the therapist a subpoena for all records. He has refused to respond to her or provide records. I sent him one final request to be informed of appointments and given all records. He will not respond. He has even seen the boys when my ex was not event present .....had someone else take them.
I'm at a loss as to what to do. Can he deny me this information because he practices in a different state?
If his just a "personal" therapist to my ex, why has he been seeing the boys twice a month for 6 months without my consent.
If he is acting as a "family therapist", why am I being denied access?
How can I find out what is going on?
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Gerald-Esquire replied 1 year ago.


Thank you for using Just Answer. I want to provide you the best service I can. Please feel free to ask any follow up questions you have.

I am an attorney with 30 years of experience; I hope to provide you information that will help you in resolving your question.

The challenge is that it is difficult to get the South Dakota sub poena enforced in the other state. You have to go tot the court in the other state and have the South Dakota sub poena "domesticated." The you can bring contempt ptoceedings in the other state if the therapist does not honor the sub poena.

You may have better results if you seek the South Dakota Court to amend the custody order to change the legal custody to you or prohibit your ex from taking the children to therapy without you being provided the information. In other words seek contempt against your ex for subverting the South Dakota custody order.

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Good luck,

Please note: Information given is not legal advice. Only your local attorney can give legal advice. I can't establish or accept an attorney-client relationship with you. All posts are available for public viewing.

Expert:  Gerald-Esquire replied 1 year ago.

Another avenue that you can pursue is to file a complaint with the therapists licensing board in the other jurisdiction.

Good luck.

Kind regards,