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I will try to best answer your question.
Your husband is not correct. Who pays the bills has nothing to do with your privacy rights. At this point he could be criminally liable for engaging in cyber stalking or stalking. He also may be criminally liable for harassment. In addition, if he has made any threats against you you should consider buying a temporary protective order which would remove him from the home. It sounds as if he is extremely controlling and potentially suffering from mental health issues. I can only imagine this is one of many examples of his extreme controlling behavior. If that is the case and you aren't happy with the situation you have two choices. 1 obtain family counseling with you and he to address the issues and determine if he is willing to admit his behavior is wrong and willing to change behavior. If he is not willing to change his behavior then you have to decide whether you are going to accept it and remain the relationship or whether you are leaving the relationship.
I hope that this information and advice is helpful and I wish you the best of luck dealing with this situation.